My love life is always a mess?
the good news is that you recognize that you are making decisions that are self destructive or perhaps immature or foolish, however you'd like to classify them. The next step is to ask yourself, why do you rush into 'love?' Is it fear that makes you speed through the important steps of getting to know someone? Is it the adrenaline rush? Try to figure out what leads to the behavior, and then start by changing the behavior. When you feel yourself rushing, slow down. Deliberately back off or change your decision or just put it off for a while. You can do this!
My friend always puts herself down?
You should tell her how annoying it is. I've learned that constantly trying to bring up someone's self-esteem when they put themself down doesn't work. But telling them that you don't like when they do it/tell them it's annoying is pretty effective.
If both of your parents are always fussing and putting you in the middle to chose sides what do I do?"?
Maybe you can get another adult like a pastor, school counselor or even another adult relative(one who is relatively neutral where your parents are concerned) to set up an appointment where you, your mom, and dad can talk freely and the other person serves as a mediator. Your parents need to realize that if they have a problem with each other that they need to deal with it by themselves and not bring you in the middle of it. They have some adult issues they need to work out and they shouldn't have to place that type of burden on you.
Why do I have trust issues/always put my guard up?
You put your guard up because you don't want to get hurt.You do this so that nobody can get a hold on your emotions. You do this so that you will have no commitment or expectation on someone else that you "know" will disappoint you.I know because I am just like you; but I also know that this is not the way we should approach life. We will meet all kinds of people in our lives. Some will betray us and take our love for granted, but some will truly care and stay with us throughout our entire lives. If we are constantly guarding our true selves, we will never find these people and they will never find us.We will tumble, and we will fall. But we get up, because we know that when we get hit hard, we don't stay down.My advice to you: don't think about how people can take advantage of you, think about how you will discover people who will accept you despite your insecurities, past, or whatever it is your guarding.Because if you never let your guard down, you will never really know who are the ones worth keeping in your life.
I've lost patience with parents who always put me down?
Everyday I wake up and I want to just be alone, away from my parents. Everyday they say horrible things like, I'm useless, I need to get my act together, I have no future, "whats wrong with you" etc. Now, Im not some wierdo hermit, i actually have a normal social life outside my house with great friends. But they dont see this side of me at all. My real side is that with my friends, but at home I cant take anymore of these put downs so I have stopped even communicating to my parents to avoid being hurt. I am now moving out on my own but even with this happening my parents want to tighten their grip by asking for a key to the flat (not in a nice way, almost demanding) etc. I feel like my life is burdened by them and I will never EVER be free. How can I get them off my back and earn their respect? They know nothing about how hard I worked to find the job I have now, to rent this flat etc. all to get away. I cannot respect my parents because they have never shown me respect.
My friends always puts herself down, and it is getting annyoing...... what should i say to her?
why she constantly does this? option 1. shes doing this for attention. option 2. she really feels bad about herself. but in either case, just let her know that its not the end of the world. im sure if she eats a pack of m&ms its not gonna make her gain 10 pounds, and like you said: cheerleading is not the world! some peoples lives are way worse and they have real problems- not just, i cant tumble, my life sucks. just help cheer her up and compliment her jumps or say 'you look really good in that shirt' or whatever. just something to make her feel better about herself. and just tell her that she shouldnt think of herself that way and that shes not fat and who cares if she cant jump or tumble the best? all she can do is her best.
My girlfriend puts me second in her life. i dont know what to do. it makes me feel less than her and inferior.
i knew someone in a similar situation. leave her and tell her why. get yourself a sweet girl that won't make u her *****. she doesn't own u and ur parents don't even have that right. Only prisoners in jail have the right to be those kinds of bitches cause they lost all their rights when they did whatever got them there. leave. u will only get angrier and more pissed off and one day u will snap and call it quits anyway but then u could have lost out on 2,3,4,5 years of life and ur soul mate might have married someone else. why waste ur life being unhappy and angry when u could be having the most exciting time of ur life. don't even play games with her trust me. tell her it is over. don't listen to her bs and there will be lots and lots of it. don't argue just say i am leaving u. u are controlling and i am unhappy. i am going to find a girl that makes me happy. do not apologize. be prepared for her to be super bitchy and jealous and make ur life really annoyinig for awhile. get a rest. order if u have to. also look happy about the future and tell her how u see the light now and how u would feel sorry for her if she wasn't such a controlling whatever. easy way out have her come home and u one day are just gone. avoid places u normally go and things u normally do she will stalk u. this way u don't have to worry about her talking u out of leaving. then get a new life make new friends and move on. if u want u can make friends with an asshole and pass her on to her and leave a note on her door that says u two deserve each other. i am not an evil morbid girl and i play by the golden rule unless it is an obvious mistake. but u mess with me u get it back i don't like all that disrespecting crap. if ur a loyal honest sincere partner u should never treat the other different than what u want and if that happens i get pissed. little stuff oh well when it gets into the major leagues i get pissed and get revenge but im fair till that point. id rather a guy just tell me straight up and then i'd be gone just like that if we couldn't work it out. if he isn't happy neither am i. thats how it goes.