Why am I always the one helping others and when I need someone nobody comes for me?
I have the exact same problem. I give money, driving, time, labour, friendship, work, DIY, chores, everything. Yet no one will lift a finger in return.I think its a mental illness, we do not have doctors that can diagnose if people have this problem. I do not like people doing anything for me anyway. I do not like feeling like i have to owe someone. I help others, but if i need help back its never done. I think society is set up like this. The problem is highlighted when person after person do not do anything.I tried to describe how it feels. Its like pushing a grand piano up a mountain, the moment you let go its straight back to the bottom.Empathy is very rare now. Look at world leaders and the wars, this would not be possible if there was empathy. I think the system is designed on greed. We get lured into wanting more and more things. People work hard. People are desperate to pay their rent, we are not allowed to live freely “off the grid”, so we all must work to pay the bills. There is no room left for empathy. Even in the bible its was said over and over that greed and money lenders are the root of the problem.When no one else helps anymore, then you have to take care of yourself. I think a ”recession” is where in society everyone has asked the next person for their help ideas and no one wants to do it anymore.If you feel hurt by others being pathetic, then just look after yourself. Never put others in charge of things that need to be done, If you handle it best then leave it your own reliable hands. The problem is where you expect others to come in their own accord.You have to assume the least of others and when certain people come wanting to do more then keep them in your life. Its that initial want from others that you are looking for.It does hurt when you make 99% of the puzzle,and that person cant be bothered to put the last piece in.So just step back, keep your money to yourself, enjoy taking care of your self, respecting yourself.
I'm not happy being Catholic. Can someone help?
There is nothing wrong with trying out some other churches... go see what the have to offer, just pay attention to see if they are doing anything that isn't correct. Some churches do things that aren't exactly in accordance with the Bible.. but thats not really a denomination thing, but varies from church to church.
Why should I help someone?
A simple but philosophical question it is. Really why should I help someone?!I am down by fever . Medicine was not at all working . I decide to be fine . Not to be burden on anyone. So i went chemist. Now here there unprescribed medicine does not help me . Then after long five days i went to emergency in a hospital . They treat me instant it was bad too much. Doctor shouted at me politely ‘ being educated you are delayed your health by prescribing yourself? Why we are here for?”I am educated. Teacher of school college they are also educated. Now if doctor is refusing to treat someone in need that they don't even think. Why ? Its her duty. Teaching also a duty. Its specialist on knowledge and uses of that knowledge makes us valuable. Here goes a duty by knowledge whatskes us to help.Now let us see what humanity and its duty. What is humanity? You are watching an accident ,you do not want to involve and left the person die as near by only you could help. If you go to sleep that night and can't sleep, thinking how that person was begging for your help - ! lifetime your silent conscience would bite you brutally. Humanity comes as duty when you make a call to police or hospital and until their reach wait . You will be free to self that you try at least. Human duty.No one force us to help another . We do . Because we want to see smile on else face . Without each other we are not able to live . That is why we are human being not animal. You have a conscience who is watching you always.Now helping comes many patterns. Physical, emotional, finance. You are free to help as per condition and your capacity.Thanks . Great question it is.LityMunshi
Why do we feel happy when we help others?
1. Because deep down we realize that our happiness depends on the happiness of others. We can only be happy in a world where the others are happy too. In an extreme case, otherwise they would get angry and kill us. I'm not a real evolutionary biologist or psychologist, a hobbyist one, but have read that in a book that discussed why altruism exists and I think that is the classic basic explanation in science. This is what Rashika Shetty said too. I can try to find a good scientific reference at some point.It also about survival of people as a whole: we want our genes to pass on to future generations, and share more genes with any human than e.g. tigers. So if we see a tiger attacking any human and have a chance to easily save the human, we will. Family and people close to us gets often precedence (explained by genetics) but the want to help does extend to anyone. Also to animals when it's not a choice between human vs. animal life.2. Being able to do something useful feels good. Because it confirms that one is able to do something useful. Chandra Haas said this clearly earlier: "It increases our self esteem in a positive way." and Justin Kemp explains it well too I find. I echo this from personal experience, haven't really read about this but seems very logical.I'd also like to note that helping others is also a part of many old religious practices -- perhaps in all religions, at least in Christianity, Buddhism, I would guess Islam .. don't know about Hinduism but would bet there too. I think that's a signal how major and integrated those mechanisms are in us since ancient times.In Buddhism it is also psychologically motivated. A step towards being in peace with yourself is to start helping others, giving to the poor etc. In some schools they require that and other concrete actions first, before get to the advanced parts with mindfulness meditation. If I've understood correctly, the motivation is that one cannot really be happy and wholesome if the concrete actions one does (or omits) are not skilful -- no matter how much and elegantly one meditates, it doesn't work properly if you also don't do good deeds. But vice versa it becomes easier, so they suggest starting from concretely helping others first.
I need some life advice. Can someone help?
Hi, I am a 17 year old. I take online courses for school (started 3 months ago, because the old public school was bad). Anyway, I need life goals. I find myself lacking in motivation because I always feel alone. I've been learning the piano, but that's not making me happy all the time, is there any goals? I don't know what I'm asking, I just feel like I need to say something.. I hope you have a nice day.
HELP! Can someone help me name famous people with the following initials? (See below)?
Hi! I'm making a list for a memory system where you have to name 100 people with certain initials. I have names for most of them, but some of the names I've come up with are not really memorable at all. If you could help me come up with some good names for the following initialis, I'd be happy to send you my completed list. This is known as the "Dominic System" and is REALLY useful for memorizing large amounts of info- and counting cards in Las Vegas, ha ha. The person who invented this system is the six time world memory champion and all of his competition use it as well, so you know it really works! Here are the initials that I need help with: (Remember to try to use famous people that are HIGHLY recognizable to most people- not an obscure actor, athlete or entertainer, otherwise it doesn't work as well. For example, for D.H., you use Dustin Hoffman or for A.A., Alan Alda. 1. O.A. 2. O.C. 3. O.E. 4. B.O. 5. B.N. 6. E.S. 7. G.O. 8. H.N. 9. N.B. 10. H.D. 11. G.D. 12. N.D.
My crush likes me but i'm not happy, Please help?
Awh, be happy! I am a shy person just like you & trust me, ive had some VERY awkward moments involving my crush. At least you know for a fact that he likes you back! My crush always looks at me, but denies liking me. I would kill to find out that he likes me, even though im shy. I think you should just try to push the embarrassed feeling away & tell yourself that it's a good thing that he likes you back. Who cares if everyone else heard? It's alright. Just keep your head held high & go get your man. ;)
What's wrong with me?, I'm never happy and never have been happy?
This sounds like probably a lifelong mild depression - which, by the way, is not uncommon. It's very wise of you and courageous to examine this, and the fact that you have never really been happy. You deserve to find happiness and a good therapist can help with that. My personal bias: anyone who is dying to get you on medication for this is not the therapist you want. You want someone who will work based on experiences and feelings, and not chemicals. (Unless there are other, very severe indications that you don't reveal here.) My first therapist (who BTW didn't have much else to help me with other than meds, which I refused) told me that I had probably been mildly depressed my whole life. I could instantly see that she was right, and it was also easy to see what the reasons for that would have been. As I've aged and had my own child, that's become even clearer! But what I'm saying is that as we start to examine what our lives have been since birth, sometimes it is very obvious why we have never been happy. Just having someone "hold our hand" while we revisit those memories can restore us to ourselves and - wonder of wonders! - we can begin to feel true, full happiness. I was in my late twenties at this time and from that age it may have been a little easier to look back and evaluate - but mainly, it's having that trusted professional there to look at our lives with us. So there is nothing wrong with YOU, but there probably have always been things that were not right with your situation. A child's needs are pretty specific and very hard for one or even two parents to meet, no matter their intentions, especially as most parents have their own damage from their own childhoods (like me with my beautiful child). So find someone to talk to that you like. If your parents don't go for this, you can start when you're 18. You have every right to this assistance and to future happiness and fulfillment.