Why do negative past experiences remain so vividly in my memory?
Memories can be triggered by the emotions we tie to them, such as a song, fragrance or color. The emotional aspect of our memories can keep things alive and vivid, whether they are positive or negative. Another, is the inability to resolve the conflict you have had with these experiences, try to focus on the problem or memory, see what can be done to resolve some of the issues that have not been focused. Trying to move forward with the future is hard when you have not dealt with the past, if you can do seek counseling to help guide along. Once you can tie up the loose ends the best way possible, then it's best to leave the past in the past. We cannot change the things that happened to us, but we can change how we react about them in the future. Take Care!
Do you invalidate other people's negative experiences if they don't "measure up" to yours?
No.The experiences I see, feel, or think does not mean that it applies to every other experience or scenario. This action is commonly called, “generalization” thinking that what you feel or see applies to what other people might be going through.It is a huge risk to assume that people are going through the same thing as you regarding negative experiences. In general, it will often cause the other to withdraw, stop talking about their experience altogether, doubt themselves, etc. which can cause greater danger to their well being if already fragile.Most of the time, if I come across somebody who has been through something different than I, I will often ask them questions if they are comfortable answering. I would become interested in learning more about their experiences while making sure that I don’t cross their boundaries.
Why are some people very private? How does such a trait develop? Is it possible to link this to childhood and if so, how?
There are a lot of reasons people are private. Here are some of the reasons I have observed:1) These days, some people are extra private just to compensate for how generally public our lives have become. They do everything they can do "stay under the radar" because once you are on the radar, it can be very difficult to get off it. By this, I am talking about the epidemic of oversharing that is occurring in today's culture. There are benefits to how easy it is for us to share with today's technology, but there are also a lot of downsides. So someone that seems private, may actually just be less publicly exposed than others. Or they may truly want to keep their info private for fear of it being publicly exposed.2.) Some people are just quiet people and often times this becomes confused with private. I know some people who would never offer up information about themselves to anyone that they don't talk to on a regular basis. However, if you are one of those people they normally talk to, they are going to tell you EVERYTHING. I guess I'm saying, some people are just shy, but once they warm up, they aren't so private after all. A better example of this is people who are shy in person, but post every thought or feeling on social media sites.3) Some people simply don't feel the need to share their person lives with others that are not close to them.4) Some feel they need to bare their own burdens alone. This could be for a number of reasons. Maybe they were screwed over by someone they told something personal too. Maybe they sustained some trauma when they were a child. Maybe they are surrounded by blabber mouths who they can't stand and so do everything they can to avoid being that way.5) Some find comfort in being alone with one's own thoughts. They prefer to sit and think own their own than to socialize with others.6) Some people also keep in a lot of personal details and opinions for fear of being ridiculed due to low self-esteem.7) There are people who have deep dark secrets that they don't want anyone to know about.8) Some people are genuinely paranoid. Some people honestly believe that the world is out to get them. That everyone they talk to could be a government spy looking to steal their life and as part of a giant grand scheme. No seriously, people do believe this.9) And last but not least, there are also people who believe that they are just superior to you and I and that we don't deserve their time of day.
I need to write a 3-5 min speech on a personal experience...help?
Interesting you posted this question after the one you posted about not being able to get a g/f that isn't over weight. You do realize that your negativity is going to attract people with like minded self esteem, ere-go you attract "fat chicks" as you call them because of your crappy outlook on life. Skinny thin women generally have good self esteem so they usually won't go for a negative nelly.. Remember that.. As for how to pick a topic, i'm currently taking speech 101 at my college and to pick my topics i just simply try to speak about things i know about. Even if the topic is negative it might help others learn something. Negative isn't always bad it can help others avoid the same negative things you encountered.
Why do young people post so much personal information on their social media?
Most humans learn primarily by experiencing the sensations which derive from the five senses. Purely mental knowledge rarely “sticks” compared to experiential knowledge derived directly from physical sensations such as pleasure and pain. Young people, especially who grow up protected from experiencing pain by their protective parents, usually develop and maintain a feeling of invincibility until they encounter situations that produce consequences, that is, life experiences that force them to rethink their conduct and the errors of their ways. This is true with basic behavior and communications in person and on social media as well. The act of sharing personal information often times triggers positive responses and enjoyment. The positive feedback produces repeat behavior and reinforces the desire to repeat the actions and experience more of the same. It is only when the action produces such and overwhelming negative consequence that the person learns the limits of the action. This is what happens in all learning and communications, not just on social media. Posting attractive photos on social media is a particularly easy way to attract attention. Many people will continue to post personal information and photos until they attract the wrong type of person and experience negative consequences. Some people have a really hard time stopping this behavior and do not learn until they are seriously harmed. This is they way peo0ple learn.
Bad experiences in japan?
i'm half japanese. i hate japan. i just spent some time there. worthwhile learning experience, but never again. i'm ashamed of my bloodline like i never was before. and i'm not some narrow minded homemaker who can't step outside my comfort zone, anything but that. i love travelling, have had amazing experiences everywhere but japan. i like starting big fights, so give me your worst if you're a japanophile or a japanese. (i am actually far more disturbed by japanophiles than actual japanese people.) by and large, japanese people are extremely uncreative and narrow minded in everyday life situations. i'm not talking about their obvious brilliance and prowess in music, art, their crazy variety shows, just the random stuff you see going on everywhere, i love all of that, of course. but their bureaucratic ways, total inability to think outside the box, mindnumbing coldness, the fact that no one talks to strangers casually (even amongst the japanese themselves) drove me cuckoo.
When you share everything with someone, why don’t they share their personal life?
Because comfort matters.People are comfortable with you sharing all personal matters and experiences without any hesitation. You know everything about them. But, you’re not comfortable in same manner as they’re with you. So, you’re hesitant to get opened.What does hinder one to get comfortable?You’re thinking right. It is judgmental mindset of others. When others sharing their personal stories with you, you would be listening them non judgmentally. But, when you tried to do same, you found that they judged you. When someone judge you, it causes stress and you feel uncomfortable sharing about yourself with them.Others would count you anytime to listen them because you always there to listen and understand them. But, when you want them to listen you, they maybe coming with excuses, not attentive while listening, not understanding, expressionless which cause discouragement to you to share your life with them. So, you not relying on them.You started sharing your one of the personal experiences with them and they just redirected topic with their complaints and struggles. And, when it repeated often, you are no longer interested in opening up with them about yourself.So, it reflects that either you are uncomfortable or discouraged that hinder you from talking about your life with others. Reasons of being uncomfortable or discouraged could vary.Some just don’t like to speak about their lives because they believe there is nothing good worth sharing with others. So, they do not talk about it. Or may be they are distracting themselves from the negative experiences of their lives to stay positive. That’s why do not recall and share about their lives.So, what’s reasons why one don’t share their personal life- Only they can tell you. Quora can’t.