Is it anti-feminist to specifically want a man that can "protect" you?
It’s difficult to answer this question without knowing how the word “protect” is applied. Is it anti-feminist for a woman to want a man to provide for her financially? Yes. Is it anti-feminist to expect a man to bail a woman out when she gets herself into financial or legal difficulty, when she should know better? Yes.To my mind, it is anti-feminist for a woman to behave like a dependent little girl and expect a man to compensate for her absence of executive-level functioning. This is so not cool.However, it is not anti-feminist for a woman to want a man who will defend her when she is in physical danger. If, for example, I am attacked in my home and my partner walks in while I’m being assaulted/raped, I expect him to take some sort of action, and not run away because he’s scared. Similarly, I would also expect that if I accidentally hit my head on a curb and started bleeding out, he would call an ambulance and try to stem the wound. But, you see, I offer my male partner the same kind of protection.To desire mutual guardianship is only natural, regardless of gender. No woman wants to think that her partner is a useless in a crisis. No man wants to think the same of a woman, either.
Are there any ex social justice warriors? What made you change? What was your tipping point?
When I left for university, I was definitely an SJW (although I had never heard that pejorative). I was the kind of scarf-wearing douchebag who preached about socialism while mommy and daddy shelled out $100K for my theatre degree.There wasn’t really one moment where I realized what SJWs were and why I didn’t want to be one of them, but here’s an incident that stands out.In one third-year class, a well-meaning theatre professor had each of us write something we were afraid to say aloud on small slips of paper and deposit them in a box, whereupon she read our confessions to the group.What I was afraid to admit I don't recall, but several others chose to share (anonymously) that they were feminists, and that they were scared to say it out loud.We were at just about the most liberal university you could imagine. Our curriculum was steeped in feminist theory. Most of our professors were open feminists. We went to class in buildings with transgender washrooms ten years before that was even a conversation. I can imagine no safer place to espouse any progressive viewpoint.Far more unacceptable was questioning them - which I had occasionally taken to doing, sometimes out of conviction, sometimes merely to disrupt the nauseating group-think. And yet, apparently, some of my feminist classmates felt the same weight of persecution in 2010 as their foremothers in 1910.To me, this minor example offered a major insight into the psychology of what we today call SJWs: reality doesn’t matter to them. It doesn’t matter how safe you make the space, how open you are. Even when they’re in the majority, as they are in academia, they act like a persecuted minority. However much you concede to them, their level of outrage remains the same.I think by then I had already realized I couldn’t stand these people; that they were actually anathema to real change; that, worst of all, maybe they secretly didn’t want real change, because then what would they have to be pissy about?