My mom is always so negative, it's affecting me badly. What can I do to stop her?
I don’t know how old you are, but I am going to offer you a very important life lesson. In life, we can either choose to try to change other people or we can try to change how we respond to other people that upset us.You have control only over how you respond to other people. You do not have control over other people’s natures or behavior. Yes, you can correct people, yes you can say don’t do that, yes you can say you are hurting me. But in the end, you get to control whether something hurts you or impacts you and you get to choose how you want to handle such things.So my first piece of advice is, don’t try to change your mom. Try to avoid putting yourself in situations which allow her to upset you or hurt you.I don’t know if your mom is always negative or if she is being negative because of the stress that she and your father are experiencing. If she is always negative, well, that is how she is. Perhaps she is worse due to the stress. If she is not normally negative, perhaps she is depressed and is having trouble seeing your artwork for the joyful effort that it is. Perhaps she is forgetting that you need praise and attention for your work, or maybe she simply hasn’t got the energy to give it to you right now.I can only tell you this. Moms are human. And they, like everyone else, only have so much energy to spare. Sometimes, this energy gets low and they have trouble showing their usual enthusiasm for the things their children do. Sometimes, when they are like this, they don’t even realize they are doing it. Sometimes they just need a hug from their children as much as their children need a hug from them.If your mom has always been negative, well, she isn’t going to change, so there is no point in asking her to do so. Just try to avoid allowing her negativity to upset you. Go elsewhere for praise for your art. If she is not normally negative, try to understand that she is stressed and having her own problems, and maybe she needs a little bit more love and support than usual.Regardless, try to understand that she doesn’t mean to hurt you. She is who she is, and she is stressed and worried right now. If she isn’t normally negative, in time, it will pass.
My parents always think I have a bad attitude?
For the past 5 years my parents always thought I had a bad attitude with everything. I would ask them a question like for example: whats for dinner?. Then my parents would yell at me saying "Kid you better get your attitude right, you have a really bad attitude, and I M SICK OF IT!" I would always be scared of what I might do next that will get me in trouble. I would always sit alone in my bedroom, while my parents and my sister are in the lounge doing something fun. I would all the time avoid my parents, because all I would cause them to do is yell at me saying I have a bad attitude. One time we as a family went to the shops, then I asked my dad if I could have this Lego set, then he grabbed my ear and yelled at me again in front of everyone in the shop saying "Get you damn attitude right". I was pretty damn embarrassed after that moment. The problem is i m the only one that gets this bullshit, my sister would ask the same question as me, and my parents would be fine and gentle with her. No bad attitude for my sister but its always me. I m the one that is never trusted, the one that causes trouble, always has an bad attitude. I m all alone with this bullshit, when ever my parents ask me "whats wrong". I use to answer them, but they would always say "really get over your self kid". So now I never tell them wahts wrong with me, because I mean why would they care. I really need help, because i m tired of getting in trouble, being yelled at, for no damn reason. Help me please
Why do YOUNG BLACK WOMEN always have attitudes?
well i can't speak for all young Black girls but I'll speak for myself. My attitude stems from being hurt one too many times. Not only was I hurt by my two failed relationships but by my mother who abused me when i was a child and so now I appear to have an attitude all the time which is not actually the case. In my defense I am really just extremely cautious. I've been used by friends and hurt by two men. I always have my guards up and my face is always serious and I have grown to hate and distrust every single man. Although I know that this is not right, I have just given up on finding love and am quite disgusted when men approach me. I am 26 by the way and I am educated and I do have class. I am a single mother and an independent person but come off as stuck up because I refuse to date anyone or accept any type of help from anyone-especially men. Plus I never knew my dad so I look at almost all men as dead beats. Why would I get a thumbs down for giving my opinion about myself? Now that's just wrong.
Mom's getting bitchy everyday and her negative attitude is bringing me down?
this is a rant but I thought i need to type this somewhere to relieve the stress. I'm a recent college grad who's still living with mom and younger brother. I have two jobs (one part time and the other is an internship) so I have a full day schedule for 5 days a week. Ever since she broke her hand 3 weeks ago from a fall, her attitude has gotten worse and she became less patient. I understand the limitations of being one handed but she doesn't need to remind me all the time and make me feel bad about it. There's one pet peeve she has and it's the dishes. For some odd reason, she gets anal over unwashed dishes even though the sink would only have 3 bowls. She wants them washed immediately. She makes a big deal out of it and it drives me crazy. My brother is spoiled and barely does anything. I would tell her to give my brother a call and she would like "why don't you do it because he won't" WELL TELL HIM TO. YOU'RE HIS MOM! And of course since my brother was raised as a spoiled brat by my mom, he expects me to get things done. Yesterday we had a huge fight over unwashed dishes and other small things (i overcooked the veggies and I got criticized. She expects me to cook like a housewife). She cries, bitches, moans, and calls me names (c%$t, *****. i finally cracked and called those names back at her), accuses me of being arrogant for making some money (which is not the case of all and I hate when she doesn't stop mentioning it because it's so hard to listen to those words). Additionally, she's always saying she's the best mom in the world and she doesn't deserve this treatment. Yeah she's a good mom because she's not good emotionally (eg: asking how our day is, how work was, etc) and i hate her constant reminders that she learns how to cook at age 8. I don't give a crap about it and I've been told more than 1000 times. She thinks I just go to work and go home. She doesn't know that my work could be exhausting because I don't rant about it. She's always ranting about her days at work and alot of times I don't like hearing them because they're negative. Her negative energy is bringing me down and I am sick of it. Oh yeah we just had another fight over DISHES. Jesus christ. It's getting ridiculous.
Why do I keep having negative thoughts of my dad dying?
Considering your tragic loss your thoughts are understandable. I don't think you can control your thoughts but you can try to respond sensibly to them and keep telling yourself your father is safe and will be with you for a long time. You also have to develop an independent attitude so you know you will be able to take care of yourself no matter what. My mother passed away when I was 16 and worried about my father doing the same. There was a history of heart disease in his family. I was like you in my thoughts. My father did pass away at the age of 89 and not of heart disease, The years i spent worrying did nothing and were a waste of time.
How do you deal with a negative father?
We always are going to come across some form of negativity in our lives. Whether we feel it ourselves, or are surrounded by someone who shows it. The object is to rise above it. Surround your inner self with a positive attitude that will dull his light of negativity. When he uses words that try to bring you down, you can listen, don't argue with him, just understand that it's his feelings, not yours.. Your positive attitude can outshine him, as long as you hold on to that energy. You can't change someone from feeling negative, though you can try if you think he will listen. The main thing is as long as you yourself can rise above his ‘Gray' cloud, then that's all that matters.Keep on shinning…
My parents think I have a bad attitude and tone?
My parents ALWAYS think I'm saying some rude to them, or in a tone. It's been this way for the past couple of years, and it's starting to frustrate me. I honestly don't hear what they're talking about, and when I get in trouble for it, I will wonder for hours what I said wrong. I do honestly believe it's just the way I talk, but my mom NEVER believes it. She sounds like she's angry all the time, even when she's not, and when I told her that, she said 'That's just how I sound.' But when I told her that I just sound like whatever rudeness she's hearing, she still thinks I'm trying to be disrespectful. When I really am not. Lately she's been telling me she's really sick of my tone. She's fed up with it. I really need help, because I'm tired of getting in trouble for something I don't even notice!
My Dad has really bad attitude problems! what can we do?
Okay my husband and I are in our early 20's we moved back in with my Mom while we are paying off our mortgage on a lot of land out west and we will start building our house on it soon , but unfortunately not soon enough! my Dad who has always been a problem for almost everyone other then one of my little brothers who has the same attitude problems as his dad has. today was the straw that broke the camels back when one of my puppies made a mess on the easy to clean floors in the hallway where that puppy has been playing my dad who has no real reason to act up started freaking out even though i was getting it all cleaned up and he doesn't clean anything around the house in the first place he has no reason to panic and he slammed the bathroom door to the point that it was stuck shut and then kicked and broke my brand new puppy hallway gate over the little pee pee that was being cleaned up already and continued to yell and scream get the F***ing Dogs out of my house, He is a Job less man who doesn't help with the house chores and doesn't put a penny into the Mortgage or Cable or ComEd bills and doesn't pay for food but he has no trouble eating food that we buy and have notes on saying don't touch! yet he sits in a chair all day watching tv and playing video games, eating all our food and calls for my poor 13 year old brother to take out their dogs even if my brother is sleeping, he wakes up to complain about anything and everything we wouldn't have to complain about him if he would stop with his attitude and complaining none stop