What do you think about working moms vs. stay-at-home moms? I would like my wife to work, even part-time, when we a start a family. I find that juggling work-family responsibilities is really just about creativity. Is it right for me to want this?
I’ve been a working mother (my husband stayed home with our first child for two years), a work-from-home mother for two years, a stay-at-home-mum for two years, a stay at home single mother for a year, and, currently, a work-from-home single mother. My main takeaway from all of these situations is this: Being a parent is hard, regardless of whether you’re working or at home. Neither is easier, neither is less work, and neither is necessarily better for the family or for the children—at least, not “forever”.The “best” situation in all cases is what feels right for BOTH parents at the time.Is it “right” for you to want to marry someone who will want to work while raising a family? Well, it’s not necessarily wrong. But it’s also no different to wanting to marry someone who will win the lotto one day—it’s a pleasant daydream.When you find someone you fall in love with and want to marry, you’ll talk about having children. Are you going to stop loving her if she says her dream is to be at home with her children for the few years before they start school? Are you going to get divorced if it turns out that, despite both of your intentions, once your first child is born her hormones decree that spending even fifteen hours a week away from her newborn sends her spiraling into depression? Based on the thoughtfulness of your question, I’m going to assume the answer is a solid no.I think all parents—regardless of gender—should have the freedom to work as much as they want to, for financial, mental health, and creative reasons. But that also means that all parents should have the freedom to spend time with their children—especially when they’re very young—if they want to, and they have the option.It occurs to me that at no point in your question did you consider the idea that perhaps your future wife would prefer to work fulltime while you stay at home with the children. Perhaps you could spend some time thinking about how many fewer hours you’d like to work to enable your future wife to continue to pursue her career.
What is it like to be a working mom?
It’s hard but totally worth it. One of the daily struggles that a working mom often comes across is managing personal and professional life. Just recently I came across a blog titled Time Management for Working Moms that provides an insight into the life of working moms and how they can maintain a balance in their lives.#1 Spend money to reclaim timeConsider leveraging your household income to free you up if you are not satisfied with your current situation.Nowadays you can easily and cheaply outsource the cooking and the cleaning and automate various aspects of your life (paying bills automatically for a small fee).#2 Learn to delegate without the “nagging” feelingThe household doesn’t have to be run solely by you. If you live with your partner, figure out a system to involve him in the day to day house chores, and if you have kids, maybe they are old enough to start helping too. Some alternative schooling systems actually make house cleaning part of the activities they learn early.You know when your house management system doesn’t work when you have the feeling you are constantly ‘’nagging” people to do stuff.A way to prevent that situation is to agree on rules as a group, and make the rules very visible. Once the rules are established, you are not longer nagging, the rules are and you are simply reminding them :)# 3 Have a weekly scheduleYour family will probably have recurring activities (like soccer). By seeing your schedule from a week perspective, it will become easier to be prepared and it will allow you to block time for the activities you want to do.Hope this helps all the working moms out there!
Working Moms when do you get time to clean your home?
Is this where I get to say Thanks for the A2A Francis Meredith? Oh you are trouble. Now I’m going to reveal something that not many people survived. Visitors to my house were never seen again. For the OP’s sake, I’m going to break my rule. XD :'CI have Saturdays and Sundays to clean house. I tried to get it most done on Saturdays, and finished up on Sunday. Actually, it is never done, but at least the prioritized items were knocked off the century old list that never gets done.I also have a 3 year old like yours, plus a 11 month old baby too. Everyday when I picked them up from their babysitter, they would be vying for my attention and would challenge each other for who gets the most attention. 11 month old do slap now. She learned from 3 year old to slap someone when they took away something she wanted. In order to even start with dinner everyday, I’ve got to make peace first. I’ll give them hugs and kisses until they start squirming to get out and away. And then I’ll deposit 11 month old in her play pen, in sight of the kitchen, give her all her favorite toys, and ask 3 year old if he’d like to help mommy? Excuse me, I might be painting a picture of someone whose gotten it all under control. Not really. Not this one, people. It was hard.I have hubby help, and 2 teenagers help as well. My other older kids are 17 and 14 years of age. I make use of them. You have to. If you don’t ask them for help, they’ll pretend not to see you. Unfortunately for them, I don’t let that happen in my house.Not only are they helping me, but they’re learning so much just by assisting. My daughter now can cook if we are going to be really late coming home. When she goes to college she can cook for herself. When she got married, she’s not going to be shamed by her in laws. These are the reason children must do their chores.If my mom should see my house, she’s going to be embarrassed. If my grandma sees my house, my ear is going to be chewed off. So there it is. I'm now the most vulnerable creature on earth. I've said too much.
Do you feel guilty as a working mom?
Life becomes combat zone once you decide to go to work leaving your little one under supervision of someone else.So what’s difficult in it? Why life is being compared by combat zone?It’s not that easy. It’s way too hard! This decision makes you feel guilt all the time and the working mom guilt is brutal. Relatives and neighbors help to feel more culprit saying, “Oh such a little fellow goes to babysitting? Poor guy!” Who do think they are to say this? What do they think I don’t love my son? If they think so, I have sympathy with them for having such a cheap thinking. No mother would ever appreciate such a disheartening remark from those ill- mannered people. Are you people really bothered about my kid or is my self- independent spirit that pinches you.This situation becomes even worse when you do not have any support system at home. It is easy to point fingers at others but someday put yourself in my shoes, you will realize how much a working mother goes through.We do have deadlines, meetings, targets, conferences unlike our male colleague. In addition, we have to take care of all little stuff at home—school event, parents meeting, cooking, laundry, feeding, cleaning, social events, and what not! Working mother masters the art of multitasking and they are eligible for the title, ‘Super mom’.I also break down when someone swank about the splendid things she does for her child which I cannot do being a working mother. But somewhere deep in my heart I know that I am not doing anything wrong. I celebrate every second of the little time that I get to spend with my son. I don’t think that I am lesser than any woman who is physically present with her children entire day. I know there is difference between being present and being attentive.I am not sorry I work rather I am grateful yet worried at same time. I am not sorry that that my son sees his dad getting him ready for school, since we both work so we split the job at home as well. I am grateful of having such an understanding partner and I wonder how single working mothers must be managing everything all alone. I salute them with all respect. I also feel good that my son is more likely to grow up to be actively engaged in the care of his own children because he has witnessed his dad doing the same. But I am worried if my son will ever get jealous of other kids whose mom stay with them all day. This thought takes peace of my mind. So here we fight everyday silently with relatives, neighbors and our self.
Stay at home Mothers vs Working Mothers?
I go to school at night after the bf gets home from work, so when i'm not there with my son, his dad or grandma is. Once I start working he'll be in school so I may only have to spend a few hours away, or i'll hopefully be able work part time. I used to nanny 3 children whose parents were extremely wealthy, the mom decided to go from working 3 days to 5 days a week while I was with them, and they had a different babysitter for every staurday night. 2 nights a week the parents would not come home until 8 or later, after seeing how much the kids missed their parents and all the other problems they had, I decided I would never leave my children with nanny's/ daycare workers as much as they do.
Working mothers are not real mothers?
I am a sahm but i dont think women who are not are not real mothers im a sahm b.c i chose to be and it makes life easier for our family .some mothers need to work and I think its amazing that they do
How do working moms find time to exercise?
It’s definitely a no-brainer that moms are busy…especially working moms! Yet, surprisingly, there are still ways to manage exercise into your day to work towards your weight-loss goals or to stay active and toned.First, it’s important to understand that as a mom, you have to redefine how you exercise. Pre-kids, we probably could spend as much time as we wanted in the gym at our leisure. Now, we must get it in where we can fit it in.This could mean turning a 5-minute commercial break into doing 100 squats, bicep curls, or jumping jacks. It could mean only going to the gym for 20–30 minutes to get a quick workout in. Or, it may mean using a fitness app like Sworkit where you follow an exercise routine while the kids are sleeping.All these scenarios work perfect for the busy mom…and it gets you closer to your health goals, helping you stay fit and burn calories.With that said, here are a few suggestions for finding the time to exercise:Block out the time - you’re more likely to keep your gym or workout appt if you block it out in your calendar. Plus it lets your household know that this is officially mommy’s workout time…and you’re not to be bothered!Make lunchtime your workout time - this is huge because you’re free of distractions plus the time is already there. Use 20–30 minutes of lunch to walk around the office building (with light dumbbells) or head to the nearby gym. Grab a buddy. Lunch is the opportune time to get exercise inInclude the kids - taking the kids to the park? Play alongside with them. You’ll break a sweat while bonding with your children. Don’t watch them play…get in on the fun!I devoted a full blog post on how to easily fit exercise into your crazy schedule…find more ideas there.Happy exercising!
How do working moms find the balance between work and family time?
Striking work-life balance is an on-going negotiation with all aspects of life, which can make things tricky at times. Try to work for an employer holding or engender a spirit of family orientation, which benefits employees, families and ultimately the employer! Use the employers mission, philosophyWe still have outdated thinking amid most employers: more time means more value. Instead, I know that investing in people means they deliver more value! “They don’t care until they know how much you care!” (unknown). Be willing to stay late or come in early when special project require that … but otherwise protect your family interests. Your children are only young once and you deserve to be as much a part of their school experience or extracurriculars as you want and can negotiate.It may take creativity and persistence, but it’s so worth it! And you can do it! Be sure to summarize your accomplishments at work at least annually and share it with your superior; likewise, review the year with your family so you all can appreciate the efforts taken and time together achieved!For me it was worth it to get up an hour early to exercise. That was important time for me … and you very much need and deserve that!