My mother has been inviting anyone she wants to go wedding dress shopping with me. She says I shouldn't bring all my bridesmaids because there's not enough room with all the people she invited. What do I do?
I’m going to be blunt here. If you’re not adult enough to negotiate shopping for a wedding dress, then you’re not adult enough to be married. You’re going to have a lot more conflicts with parents on both sides, and you have to be independent enough to make your own decisions and not let your parents control your lives.Now is a really good time to show your parents that you are your own person, you’re ready to start your new life as a completely independent person, and you’re not going to let them continue making decisions for you about every frivolous little thing.I’m not saying that you should cut your mom out of the process, and if your parents are paying for the dress and the wedding, then of course they should have some input, particularly when it comes to how much money you’re spending. But you need to be an adult and not a child.If you value your mom’s opinion about fashion, or you just want to bond with her over the experience, then it’s fine for her to be there. As far as her bringing an entire entourage, you need to stand your ground. Don’t sneak around, don’t start a war, but let her know that you’re not comfortable with all these people being part of the process. Its too confusing to have that many opinions, you don’t know them well enough to want them watching you change clothes, and this is a very very special time for you. It’s not special for them. At all.At some point after the dress is purchased and you’re going in for a fitting, maybe she can invite her friends for a special reveal. But at that point their opinions don’t matter, because the decision has been made. They can oooh and ahhh over the dress, but that’s it.
Should I invite my mother to my wedding?
Please talk to your father immediately and get her help for her mental illness. That's something your father has been remiss about for years, and I'm sorry for the extent to which it has affected you and your relationship with her. I don't know what his religious beliefs say about mental illness, but science has shown it has an organic cause like a physical illness. Your mother needs and deserves treatment, and neither of you has done her any favors by just pretending to tolerate it. Treatment can be effective. I don't know if your father makes a good living, but maybe you can take a little of your earnings and actually help your mother have a better life, if that's what it takes for her to get to a good doctor. You'd do it if she had a chronic physical illness; you should do it for this. It's far more important than a fancy party for one day, if you'd have to choose. Good luck to you all.
Wedding and Family Drama?
My mother and father are divorced over 10 years. They hate eachother and my father cannot stand the idea of being in the same room as my Mother's husband. They have never been in the same room and he (my father) is making me crazy about and has been since I got engaged. Other then that, there seems to be issues all over the place with both of our families. For example, her cousin wants to brin her kids (3 of them) and we are only having newphews/nieces and 1 first cousin. The Cousin cannot afford to give us a gift as it is and she cannot get it through her head that her family will cost us nearly $500!! Anybody dealing /dealt with family drama and how did they deal with it?
Why do parents get offended when their children are not invited to weddings? ?
I want to make it very clear that I love children, so please don't think that I hate them or am some cruel witch or something...but, there are some parents on this planet who just cannot accept the fact that not everyone wants their children around all the time. I understand loving your children and wanting to be with them, but if you have reached a point where you literally can't handle spending ONE night away from your kids, that's a bit weird.