I feel indifferent towards my friend's children.?
I was the same way around that age, a little younger. I had a group of girls who all had babies young. My best friend had one by accident, and the rest of the girls jumped on board but planned theirs to trap their boyfriends (which didn't work). I loved holding them, but i was still wanted to go out and i didn't want to sit around and talk about babies all the time. Now that i'm older and have a baby, well of course i love to talk about them :) But sometimes when you're at two different places in your life, you just drift apart. Sad but that's what happens.
Should I feel guilty about calling CHILD PROTECTIVE SERVICES?
Even though I would normally say "No, don't call CPS, you are her family and should talk to her" in this case... YES! I have seen people under the influence of vicoden and they are fine, just a little sleepy. Vicoden doesn't affect me the same way it does others, though. Mixing those with Somas is not safe for her, nor is it safe for her to be driving around with her 4 yr old child. She is endangering herself, her child, and every other man, woman, child, and pet out on the roads or sidewalks. You should not feel guilty if she can learn from this and get some rehab. You could also put in for what is called "Family Foster Care" and that is where (after following strict guidelines) you are approved by the state to take in your 4 yr old family member as a foster child. She will still be able to see the child but under supervision while she is being taught how to be a better parent. She will most likely be recommended to a psych evaluation, a drug test, parenting classes, and a medical assessment. If she does those or at least shows that she is trying to comply, the state will work with her. I would rather feel guilty for taking action to save the life of a 4 yr old than to stand by and let something happen to that child. That guilt will follow you forever, whereas the guilt of taking action would be a gratification when she gets the help she needs and turns her life around. Good luck and please, whatever you do, think of the child first and not your guilt. No offense intended.
How do I deal with death of a family member? It hurts too much. I wanna die too?
Hi,I was in My 10th standard then.I was 14 then. Its as usual a great day. I went to school, played cricket had good time with friends and came back home. Someone called and suddenly my mother and grandmother went to our other house (near by). Hours passed and one of our neighbours came and said My Grand Father Died. What?? its a biggest shock in My Life. My Good Elder friend who taught me how to ride bicycle. Who takes me on ride to show festivals in my living area.Who buys me goodies. Who scolds My mother when she is beating me. No more!!!I had no pain, not even a single drop of tear, Everything stopped for a moment. I am feeling nothing. Only thing in my mind, Why him? he even had dinner with us last day and he is very active. He died all of a sudden on his bed.We did rituals for My Grandfather. All of them are Crying. I don't remember his name, but I asked one of the person why did he died? He said - he is now at peace. What does that mean? Humans come to this world do to some work. once they did that work they have to leave. Its like a game, you play your part and once you finish the game, you leave. If he left to some place from me where did he go? He is with the higher form of Energy which you cant see with your eyes, but he is always with you looking after you. You mean he is always with me? Yes he always watches you. He might not talk to you, but he do.These words still have impact on me. I never miss my grandfather because he is always with me.I learned it over a course of time that People never stay in your life. Its all about the memories and great impact they make in your life.The first main thing is that you never know how long you exist in this world, every one should leave when the time comes. Its just matte of time and one leaves early than you, but we all reach the same point.Its all in the Circle of Life.How to Deal with it?What has gone you can never bring it back, Take Care of the Ones Who is with You.PS: Its entirely My perspective of life.
If someone in your family makes you feel bad emotionally should you cut all ties with them?
Sorry to be the one to say it but you are never going to be able to change how your mother treats you. Period. End of story. So what can you do? Precious little. Try "talking about your feelings" Ha. Who has a reasobable mother? Not me thats for sure and obviously not you. Ok the person that created you physically and mentally pushes your buttons then acts like you are the asshole and that infuriates you. Here is the only thing you can do without actually being the asshole. When she gives you some crap and you respond with crap you guys will be mad at each other for awhile and kinda give the cold shoulder. You drew, she stews, everybody avoids you like the plague because they don't want to hear it and it's stupid unworthy of their precious time. So you just give each other some space and when she gets tired of the cold shoulder she will call or something. Usually my birthday card or Christmas card whatever card sending occasion it is comes in the mail so I am bound by my upbringing to call and say thanks. She raised me like that you know, she raised me to say thank you and please. She raised me to get over the small stuff in time and the big stuff in more time. She raised me to not bring up every little slight and to know that she only rags on me because she loves me. You don't need to have every argument, big and small, worked out in the end you guys will just sorta accept each others faults or at least overlook them. When you get older and your mom is older too you will be glad you didn't just push her out of your life because eventually, if you are lucky, there will be that 1 time you thought you would never see, you will see that your mom is proud of you. I hope anyway. If she's that big of a bitch just give the cold shoulder until she can't stand it any more. She will want to act like she's got some respect if she wants to know her grandkids.
Is it bad to cut ties with your family?
I used to be really close to my family but these past few months I don't really want to be around them anymore. I even feel like I love my friends more than my family. have a lot of family problems at home - my parents don't get along and may get separated soon, my dad mistreats my mom, one of my siblings has an illness, financial difficulties and other things. Everyone fights all the time and is in a bad mood and it just stresses me out and makes me depressed. I also don't get along with my parents recently, because they have some close-minded ideas about certain things and I don't agree with them. Also recently my mom is treating me like a child and trying to run my life. My parents immigrated here from another country so I feel I am stuck between two cultures and expected to act and be a certain way, and I am so frustrated with it. I feel I can't be the person I want to be. Things got so bad that I felt depressed all the time and realized that I am happier when I am at school or with friends. I am going to move out sometime soon, however my grandmother makes me feel guilty for leaving my mom and says I need to take care of her because she has nobody else and she has a lot of problems at home to deal with. I feel really bad for leaving her and also because I just don't want to be around my family anymore, I feel as if I am a bad person.
How do you make yourself not feel guilty when you say "no" to people?
We all want to fit in, if you say no then unconsciously we're primed to think we will cause offence and be ousted.Everyone remembers the anxiety of day one at school. You're being pushed into a new environment, wearing a silly uniform and you probably don't know anyone. Mom hasn't helped because she's been crying throughout the drive and now she's left you feeling like a neurotic mess. Everyone seems to have friends except you, meaning you need to do something that's out of your character to fit in. Fast forward twelve years and you're a product of your environment rather than your own beliefs. You're told to fit in.Your current situation is that saying no makes you feel bad. If you say the dreaded word to someone they may not like you. They may think you're different and they may speak badly about you. You're back in that school environment where you just want to fit in.The truth is you don't want to fit in, you want to say no and move on with your life. Guilt is a powerful emotion but the only way to get over this situation is to rationalize your feelings relating to the consequences. Sure, you won't fit in. Sure, you might ruin a relationship but if saying no ruins a relationship then do you really want it?
Why are some parents so cheap? I feel bad because my kid has alot of nice, expensive toys and?
Well, first you asked why are some parents so cheap.... then you said they're less fortunate (which is a nice way of saying they're poor). So, I don't think they're being cheap if they don't have the $$ to do differently. Sounds to me like you're proud of the fact that you can afford nice stuff. I never feel bad for having nicer things than some of my friends. Why should I? I don't think I'm better than them!
Why would homeless people's family allow them to be homeless?
A large number of homeless people are mentally ill or brain damaged and their families cannot deal with them any longer. My own father went homeless after being released from prison for pedophelia, having sexually molested me, my step sister, and a child he was babysitting (these are the ones known, there are probably many others). The family could not deal with him any longer. He was brain damaged from repeated concussions from sports and several car accidents. It's hard to know what caused what. Did he drive so crazy and have bad judgment from brain damage, or did he get brain damage from driving fast and poorly? But it released his inhibitions and allowed him to prey on the innocent.Pedophelia was not the only manifestation of brain damage. He was also irrational and quick to anger. He borrowed or stole things from the family. He couldn't keep a job. He pushed the family towards the poorhouse.It was an attempt to stabilize the family that led to my dad being kicked out of the family home. He was likely 30 by then, living with his parents. He had been lovingly called the black sheep until his conviction. After that we just did not talk about him at all. It's as if we were part of the family by adoption rather than birth. The family kept tabs on where he was and gave him some money occasionally. He eventually was employed enough to rent a tiny studio apartment and buy a beat up bicycle. Rather employed long enough in a union job to get unemployment whenever he was laid off. He lived in that apartment over 10 years until he died of an illness rather suddenly. He never did admit to having molested me, only saying that he did not remember. Perhaps that is the brain damage, but I don't know how a person could forget a thing like that.It's painful to have a family member who is homeless. When people ask about your family, you either have to lie or become a victim of their pity. It's kind of horrifying, but the family was being ripped limb from limb while he was present so this is the best alternative. It is a relief that he is no longer around.