Should I let my 17-year-old daughter drive two hours to another city with her friend and her friend's boyfriend for a university tour?
Should I let my 17-year-old daughter drive several hours to a far away city (2 hours) with her friend and her friend's boyfriend for a university tour?Thanks for the A2A….My answer: of course you should…you might as well allow something while your daughter still thinks you have the right to do so. She might have just said she is going and not asked permission!Mom, your daughter is almost an adult. She needs to learn how to make adult decisions. This is the time for moms to let go of restrictions and relax the boundaries so teens can learn what it means to make decisions on their own.Compared to some things she might be doing, traveling only 2 hours (which IMH0 is NOT a ‘far away city’) is a minor thing to do but important for her development.Be supportive in this..give her some cash for gas and lunch and tell her to have a good time..ask her to text you her opinion of the campus….a sideways way of knowing she's fine. Don’t bug her with worrying cell calls or texts.Hold your sense of “my baby is growing up’ in reserve and let your daughter bloom with your wholehearted support.Time for you to learn how to parent a young adult, BTW. It’s way different than having a dependent teen.I see another has said you should be going-but I disagree. You can go on the next college trip..let her have the freedom of this already planned trip..
Would you let your 17 year old daughter drive 5 hours with another 17 year old girl to visit her sister in college?
Yes.I moved to college at age seventeen, alone. My family packed my car and waved goodbye as I drove away. My bonus sister from Hawaii got on an airplane and moved to Oklahoma for college at age seventeen. Another female classmate from New Jersey was sixteen and a male only fourteen. We all lived in the same highrise dorm with no parents in that city. My parents were the closest being only about 30 minutes away by car, but we were all living independently at school. The fourteen year old stayed on campus and had more limits, but the rest of us were living as adults, managing schedules, finding jobs, paying our bills, doing our laundry and not asking our parents for permission to take a simple road trip with a friend.I didn't even inform my parents when I would hop into a car with friends and drive about three hours to Dallas on a weekend night as a freshman. My roommate knew where I was in case they called looking for me, but as I had been exercising increasing levels of independence and responsibility since childhood my parents were confident that I was not an idiot who would walk into traffic or something by the time that I was in junior high much less high school. I was allowed to travel with another teen from our military base in Germany using public transportation to sing a corporate gig in the middle of Frankfurt about an hour travel time from our home. We had no home phone, no cell phones back then, and there were terrorists active in our region during those years. I was only fourteen when I started that 10th grade year in a foreign country, so if I seem a bit shocked at this question maybe this will help to explain it.If a seventeen year old cannot make a five hour road trip to visit a sibling even if that younger sibling is still in high school, how on earth will they be ready to function at college in a year or less? Loosen the apron strings and trust that you raised your children properly because if you have not done your job as a parent by that age, banning one road trip won't fix a thing. I heard the whir of a helicopter when I read this question. Please back away slowly from the almost adult and let them exercise the gray matter sitting above their neck. It's time.
My 17 year old daughter says that she is scared to drive. How can I convince her that there is nothing to be scared about?
Please honor your daughter’s fear. Some folks are afraid of heights, water, fire, crowds, and certain sounds. These are legitimate fears in their mind. Psychologists are excellent at neutralizing these fears. Do not imagine she is just like you.A friend was in no hurry to drive when her parents offered her a car while a freshman in college. She was 23 when she bought herself her first car. In no time she had been in a 3 car rear end. When she got her car back, it continued to be rear-ended and side swiped 5 more times. Like attracts like and fear is a magnet.Defensive driving. Talk about what to do when you see a stopped or flipped vehicle. Plan A, Plan B, and even Plan C. Cell phone dead zones. Talk about fog, rain and blinding rain, snow and mud on the windshield. What to do if this or that happens. Why tires must have a certain amount of air and how to change a tire. Why we need oil, and what to do if that light comes on. Beware of things flying out the back of a truck, like ladders and even just a baseball, when you are driving 65. Also, beware of bodies falling out of the sky as a motorcyclist hits another vehicle. I have seen this twice! Six acquaintances died in traffic accidents before their 18th birthday. I always start my day behind the wheel with a prayer. One you might like is: “May the White Light of the Holy Spirit (or your divine) surround this vehicle and its inhabitants. Get us to our destination, on time with our wits about us and with harm to no one. This is for ALL traveling throughout the omniverse at this time. Amen.” Food for thought.
Should I let a 17 year old drive me and my friends "around"?
I’ll skip the right/wrong aspects and stick with the really simple risk.Teenagers are TERRIBLE drivers. Everyone but teenagers know this. And then you want to take someone who is already a comparatively terrible driver and add a distraction factor. This takes bad and makes it worse. Here is my completely subjective ranking of driver distractions.On a scale from 1 - 10 where 1=Least distracting and 10= Most distractingDriver changing radio station = 2Driver talking on hands free phone = 3Driver talking on cell phone = 3.5Driver being a little drunk = 7Driver texting = 7.5Driver being poked in the ribs continuously with a stick = 8Hetero 17 yr old boy driving a carload of girls he’d like to bang* = 9Driver actually having sex while driving = 10The moral of this story is, just do what countless other girls have done and have your parents drop you off at your “girlfriend’s house” for a “sleepover” and then get high and drunk in the basement, then sleep it off.*This includes every female (who isn’t a close relative) between the ages of 14 and 30 to one degree or another.
16 (almost 17) year old daughter sneaking around to see a boy who is 20.?
When I was 16 I had a guy friend who was 20, and he wanted to date. I of course did too (he was older and cute, lol), but I didn't think my parents would let me, so I just didn't even tempt myself. With your daughter, you've got a couple of options. You could stand firm with your age rule and take away and driving privileges she has now since she snuck around to see him already. This will obviously have negative effects because she'll just resent you, but it just might keep her safe. You could tell her the reason you created the rule so that she knows it wasn't arbitrary and agree to meet her boyfriend formally. If you approve of him, she can continue to date him. If you feel things are just going to get too serious too quickly, you could resort to the former suggestion. Make sure she knows that your interest in her dating habits is out of love and the need to protect her from harm (be it physical or emotional). By giving the 20 year old a chance, you'll send a much more positive message to your daughter and she'll be more likely to be open and honest with you about her boyfriends in the future. Personally though, I don't see why a 20 year old would WANT to date a 17 year old. Best of luck with whatever decision you make!
Should I let my 17 year old daughter date?
Now days girls have a baby or have had multiple sexual partners by 14. I think she would be fine to date at 17 just set some ground rules with it. Whats going to happen is as soon as she turns 18 she is gonna rebel. She will know she can move out and be FREE! she can date, she can sleep with, she can do what ever she wants. It will be an overload to her n it will happen. An average party has drinking, sex acts, hook ups, drugs ect. This is all one night n its easy too get hooked on this behavior if you were sheltered by parents .. i know i did. Im 25 now - ive knocked it off cause its almost killed me. You as a parent should encourage her to have male "friends" not to date much. Teach her to survive out their in this world. Dating only sets her up for heart break and emotional turmoil. Having her friends she can still hang n see the real side of the guys. Dating is an act n she will see who they want her to see. teach her to observe the real person through problems, how do they commit to things in life, trials, values in life, goals. This will help her pick a potential good husband and teach her commitment in a relationship. Their are also a ton of things you should teach her as a young woman as to be responsible for her self, to keep her room clean, chores done, cooking and just how to be a good wife by example. These are all things that will help her land a husband and be able to manage a house. I would deff make her responsibilities mix with her dating, if this n this is not done she cant date.
Should I let my 15 year old daughter smoke weed?
Sir, or ma’am, first I want to say, it is totally 100% up to you whether YOU are OKAY with her smoking weed. But now I’m going to tell you, you have 100% no control over if she does or doesn’t.I’m 16 y/o now, and started smoking at 14. I’m a bright child, get straight A’s, have a good home life, and am not a bad child.I didn’t ask my mother if I could smoke weed, I knew there was no reason cuz the answer would be no. But I did it anyways. I didn’t do it to run away from my problems, or escape reality, I did it because I wanted to experience weed for myself at least once. but I wanted to do it with friends, and people who would be fun to do it with.Smoking weed does have it’s side-effects, but nothing bad. yeah, once in a while if you smoke too much, you might get paranoid, but I’ll tell you know, too much weed can also make her feel sick to her stomach and make her stop herself before she gets that high. Smoking weed can be so helpful to a person, no matter what age. I have trouble concentrating, anxiety,social anxiety, and insomnia. When I smoke weed in small amounts, I sleep better, and can communicate better, concentrate so much more, especially with school.And who is she smoking with? More than likely friends that care about her. She wouldn’t do it alone unless she was at home or out back in the yard. As long as she is with friends, nothing bad will happen. I’ll tell you now, all stoners look out for other stoners, especially first time smokers! as it’s said, “A stoner never lets a stoner get stoned.” meaning they never let a friend get harmed. they’ll keep her fed, and give her a place to sleep if she is sleep, take her out to do fun things while she is high, and watch her to make sure she doesn’t do stupid shit.In my opinion, let her smoke. At least then, you know she is doing it, and she will be honest with you about it. Smoke with her, so you know what it is like, so you know how she feels. For all you know, you might end up liking the way you feel high, or maybe even realize it helps you in some way.Just remember, you can’t stop her, she is 15. you can only talk to her, and understand.P.S if she is smoking after you said no, and you find out, yelling atop your lungs won’t help at all. I should know. it will make the situation worse. just sit her down and talk to her like a normal person.