So yesterday, I went through my boyfriend’s phone and found him talking sexually to his ex, how do we rebuild trust? Or is it too late?
Actually trust is a day to day subject. Life is very big and there are too many different kind of situations and different type of mental conditions. No one can say that he/she is always be layal. If one person have very high self esteem only then it will be possible. Spcially in case of boys..So I think what you asked is not important. Main question is that can you accept him with same feelings again after such kind of mistakes. Because there ino garenty that these things will never happen in future. It may be. So ask yourself that can you forgive him. If so then there is never be late. To build trust is very easy. But to retain it is a very difficult task. I am a relationship expert and everyday lot of boys and girls come to me with similar situations. This problem will be always there. Main question is, are we have a plan to face it in any time of life. Now tell me one thing. If you would be his wife then what would you do. So forget about trust of loyalty. Ask yourself that can you able to love him with the same ferlings as before or not. If your fellings are changed then it’s really too late.Anyways if you want to more about how to get and maintain real love or want to know about boys mentality then you can read my articles in my website. I am a love and relationship expert and I share my knowledge and experiances here.www.lovelife21stcentury.com
Yesterday I found out that my girlfriend was in a relationship with her ex and she was pregnant. What should I do?
I think you should just ignore this fact. If you really like her then try to think with her perspective. How hard it would have been for her in being a relationship, getting an abortion and having to deal with a breakup.If you really love her, then accept how she is in the present and move on with a happy life. Life has already been unfair for her once, don't do anything which spoils another relationship for her. Give her a chance.
Yesterday I found out someone has posted my boyfriend's military memorial service on youtube?!?
That's very disrespectful. I'm so sorry. People are just so inconsiderate! They might have just been trying to "be nice" and "honor" him, but it's disrespectful. They didn't even ASK permission! If they want to film these things and/or post the video to the internet, they need to ask the loved ones FIRST. If they say no, then that's that. I personally wouldn't want anyone doing this to me. If I seen it live and in person, I really don't want a video constantly reminding me of it. I had a friend killed in Afghanistan last year. As far as I know, none of the services were filmed or posted online. I would be upset if I found out they were though (geez - maybe I should check after this, right!). The news paper did publish a picture of the flag over the casket and I was upset enough by that. I seen the flag over the casket when I went to the services - I don't need to see it anymore! I would contact the poster of the video and explain you'd like it taken down. If they don't agree, report it to YouTube and explain you, as a loved one, have every right to want it taken down. Request that the video be removed. If you need to, seek legal action and see if you can force them to take it down that way. Good luck and I'm sorry for your lose! EDIT - Well then. I checked and sure enough - there is coverage of stuff for my friend there as well. Some of it I'm not bothered by - local news coverage (someone just felt the need to post the story they gave on it), a Tribute video from a place that does tributes for any fallen hero... but then I discovered a video of the PGR motorcade escort. Luckily it didn't really show anything of HIM - just the motorcycles with flags leading the way, but still... I knew what it was for :( Also, there was posting (thanks to a news site once again) of a memorial service that was held for him back and October (when he was due to come home). I found some common military memorial stuff for any/all fallen heroes too - I made the mistake of watching a couple and broke down =/ I'm just glad I didn't find anything as bad as you did.
I found out my boyfriend posted ads on Craigslist - do I leave him?
Last night I found out that my boyfriend of a year and a half has posted ads on Craigslist under "Casual Encounters". In one ad he even put his number (but on CL they don't allow this to go through). He also has an Xtube account and he posted comments and messages to other girls but they never responded. Basically my boyfriend has had a one-way relationship online. He claims no one ever responded to his ads and that he never responded to any ads. I feel so hurt that he would be doing this behind my back for this long. (Some of the posts he sent were a day before our anniversary, and two days before a vacation we took together). He cried and said he has never and will never do anything with anyone. He's begging my forgiveness. I just don't know what to do. And we are supposed to be moving in together this summer. A slight "twist" is that he caught me drunkenly making out with an ex six days into our relationship and he forgave me. But my infidelity was a one-night mistake. His lasted almost a year. I pointed out that I felt so guilty when I was making out with that guy and I would feel incredibly guilty putting an ad on CL. He said he felt guilty too. BUT HE POSTED ON CRAIGSLIST 5 TIMES! How can you feel guilty and post over and over? He deleted his accounts and he even got sick because he felt so guilty. He said he only did this stuff online because he was bored, but he never planned for it to go anywhere. I can't help but think "What If?" What if someone responded to his ad and they talked back and forth through e-mail? What if he's lying and he DID meet with someone? The most hurtful part is that I never really thought he would do something like this. I knew he liked watching porn but I never ever thought he would post ads on Craigslist offering his "hard d**k" and leaving his number. I do believe that he would never do this again - but how can I get over the fact that this even happened in the first place? I just don't know what to do. Sorry this was so long-winded but I need to vent and am very embarrassed to tell my friends.
My boyfriend cheated. He admitted it to me yesterday, and promises he won't do it again. He's normally a good guy. Should I give him another chance?
Make promises in one hand and crap in the other and see which gets filled first.I have the dubious honor of having both successfully and unsuccessfully navigated relationships through major deceptions. I do not believe once a cheater always a cheater, nor do I believe in forgive and forget.“Sorry,” like love, is a verb. It's something he has to DO. Is he absolutely devastated that he hurt you? Completely understanding of the fact that he has eroded your trust and must *do things* to earn it back?Not easy things, like flowers and promises. Hard things, like giving you his passwords and letting you know where he is at all times. Incredibly hard things, like talking with you about his needs and feelings and whatever it was that made cheating seem like a good idea. Impossibly hard things, like hugging you when something reminds you of what happened and you start randomly crying about it 3 months later.And most likely seeing a therapist, either with you or alone or both.I have personally had my trust burned to the ground on multiple occasions, and in most cases I metaphorically pissed on the ashes and broke off the relationship. But in one case, through *enormous* dedication and love, the relationship rose back up like a phoenix and was better than it had ever been. In each case, I still feel very strongly that I made the right decision.BUT:if he tries to blame youif he gets angry at you for being angryif he is anything but cooperative about spending an *indefinite* amount of time being 100% transparent with youif he says the words “forgive and forget”if he says the words “clean slate”if he tries to place any conditions on his “one more chance”… save yourself the trouble and piss on those ashes while they are still smoldering.
A year ago I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me a lot but forgave him. Yesterday I discovered that he's still doing it. What should I do?
Leave. No, run away as fast as you can.Normally I say leave when you find out they cheated, but you chose to forgive him. When that happens two scenarios can happen: the guy will take your forgiveness as a sign they should change and stop cheating (what you wanted), or they will take your forgiveness as a sign they can get away with cheating on you because you’ve shown you will stay and tolerate it. Your boyfriend unfortunately chose to do the second option.Cheating also tends to get easier the more you do it, especially if it’s on the same person multiple times. You really do not want to stay with him any longer because he’s shown he has no respect for you and what you expect from a monogamous relationship. Chances are he’s gonna continue cheating. Have respect for yourself as a female and be strong. Don’t stay with someone just to avoid loneliness: be with someone who loves you.
My boyfriend slept with someone else...?
We have been together for 6 months now and recently broke up 3 weeks ago cuz we had a lot of problems and he "needed time" and wanted to be friends.. Well obviously we got back together and he told me he just kissed someone else while we broke up for 1WEEK!!!! Yesterday I found out he slept with her I know we weren't together but he lied and we only broke up for 7 freaking days geez. Makes me think he didn't care about me cuz I personally would be too hurt to mess with someone else so quickly! He wants me to let it go cuz it's in the "past" and he completely stopped talking to her but it's not easy...... Do I have a right to be hurt and breakup up with him? Or do I need to get over it because he was a free man? I'm so confused.
My boyfriend found out I kissed a guy during our break up. What should I do?
We dated for one year. I broke up with him and tried to get back with him. I begged him and asked him back multiple times pouring my feelings out. My boyfriend could only say “I dont know what I want anymore” “I need time”. I felt completely rejected. I made guy friends. This guy friend had the intentions to do something more with me, but I wanted to be just friends. After a month of fighting with my ex, he still didnt know what he wanted or whether if he would ever be happy with me again. So I got upset, my friend walked me home and listened to my story. We were drunk at the time. we made out and he asked for more, but I denied him. I was so devastated that I cried in front of the guy and my friend just held me. He never made a move on me again, but respected my space. We actually hung out in groups as friends and nothing more. My boyfriend finally came around after a month and a half. He asked me at first if anything happened with a guy. I will admit I lied and told him no. That was a huge mistake. Two weeks after of being happy with each other, he asked me again and I could not lie. I told him that I made out with this friend. He was furious and did not want to see me or talk to me. He sees kissing and sex as the same thing. Btw i am 21 and he is 18. Did I do anything wrong?
Yesterday I broke up with my girl. I found out through different sources that she was interested in some other guy who worked in her company. Was it the right thing to do?
Hey buddy looks like she is stupid enough to loose a responsible guy like you. So you took her blame on yourself and walked free of a relationship that was gonna crumble sooner or later. You took a RIGHT decision. And yes you did the right thing. Trust me taking responsibility already made you a bigger person. Best of luck with your life ahead! :)