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Comebacks if someone calls you an Imbecile

What are the best comebacks when someone calls you gay?

I have been bullied in junior and high school for years.  This was back in the mid to late 1970s.
Being gay back then had a heavy social stigma because so many gay ppl were in the closet, but my peers figured it out.
This is how I coped and overcame:
I told my parents in 1976, 14 years old, that I was gay. They were not happy, but still loved me.  I went to see a counselor every week; and this helped a lot.
The kids I thought were crazy or dangerous, I avoided and ignored.
I rarely got into a fist fight, unless the bully hit me first.
I was determined to survive in this world and do the best I can and work toward living my dreams.
I studied very hard and got good grades; so I showed them, did'nt I?
I have a str0ng faith and prayful relationship with God/Jesus, and trust me if you ask God for help with your life's problems, he WILL help you.  He is a loving God!
I focused on activities that gave me self esteem and that I was good at.

When someone attacks you verbally, always fight back with a question?
If you ask questions, putting them on the spot, they will be less likely to bully you, at least verbally.
Ex.  Are you gay?!    Answer:  Why?  do you have a need to know?  Do you want some?  are you coming on to me?  (they will be embarrassed).
Or, "are you having a bad day, or just a bad, lousy life?" 

- Get help from your school teachers, principals, and other adults.
Join a group for LGBT youth and get help.  Remember, I never had these options in the 1970s.  Be grateful you do!  Lastly, develop and attitude of determination; that you will do your best to survive, grow, and prosper.
I have held this attitude my whole life.  Remember, its not how many times you get knocked down by life, it's how many times you get back up!

God bless you all, Greg

Comebacks if someone calls you an Imbecile?

Probably the best way to handle that is to agree with them, and say something like, "Yeah, I'm pretty stupid most of the time, but I keep trying to do better." Or you could say, "I'm sorry. I guess not everyone can be as brilliant as you are, or think you are." Another way to deal with it would be, "Well, some of the world's greatest minds were called stupid, like Einstein or Columbus, so I guess I'm in good company." Forrest Gump's mother told him to say, "Stupid is, as stupid does." PeeWee Herman would say, "I know you are but what am I?"
Good luck

Good comebacks when someone calls you fat and/or ugly?

LOLOL
here`s α bunch, hope they help =]
if someone sαys your fαt/ugly :

- funny. i thought the sαme thing αbout you .
- but your mom loves me for thαt .
- thαt`s not whαt your mom sαid lαst nite .
- there you go, tαlking to yourself αgαin .
- hey, who let you out of your cαge ?
- αwwh, you notcied ? dumb***
- looks like me & you will get αlong nicely then .
- is there α mirror behind me ?
- NO -nαme of the person who cαlled you fαt/ugly- I WILL NOT TAKE OFF MY PANTS .
- who`s eyes αre you using to look αt me ? better tell `em they need glαsses .
- well, you look like α cross between me & ur mom .
- you know why i`m so fαt ? cuz everytime i`m done screwing your boy/girlfriend he/she mαke me α sαndwich .
- look who`s tαlking jαck***
- yeαh, you know whαt ? go pick on someone your own size - there`s α bus in the pαrking lot .
- tαkes one to know one .
- so`s your fαce/mom

lmfαoo xD
αnd if they decide to tell you to shutup
smile sweetly & sαy no thαnks (:
&& if they sαy fck you
then either sαy when ? or come closer ;)
works everytime, good luck ! !

What are some witty comebacks i can say when someone calls me awkward?

Here are my TOP TEN witty comebacks when someone calls you awkward:

10. What? Would that be sorta like now ...because of your ignorant comment?

9. Awkward? ...Awkward?!! Why I'll have you know I've been told I have all the grace of a blind hippo on roller skates, ...juggling bowling balls ...and, eating yogurt. (O.K. I made up the yogurt part.)

8. Too, late. I stopped caring about your opinions yesterday.

7. Yeah, but, I bet I could still poke you in the eye AND kick you in the shin at the same time. Hold still and let's find out.

6. I'm awkward ...only to the UNTRAINED eye.

5. I'm awkward. She's ugly. You're stupid. EVERYBODY'S a critic.

4. Keep it to yourself, Derwood (or, Shagundella)

3. Imagine you are on a white sandy beach. Waves of crystal blue water are gently lapping the shore. It is sunset. The sky is golden and scattered with brilliant orange/pink clouds. You're with your true love. He/she is stabbing you repeatedly with a rusty screwdriver.

2. I'm not awkward. I'm inventing a new art form. Only a$$holes don't appreciate it.

1. Your parole officer won't like it when I tell him you're harassing me.

Funny comebacks/insults to say after somebody calls you a pig?

It's best to cover your mouth and say "excuse me" when you burp, and try to keep your mouth closed to hold it in. If you are doing this and he still comments, you can always say, " It takes one to know one" and smile sarcastically at him. You can also say, "Not bad manners, just good food", and laugh easily, when you can't avoid a burp. He's probably saying these things because your burping is disturbing him in some way. I hope that you are trying to avoid burping in public, as it is considered bad manners, but sometimes you just can't help to burp once in awhile. You may want to avoid carbonated drinks, or gassy foods to help with the burping issue, and try taking some over the counter medication for gas to cut down on the burping in class.

Comebacks to being called a thief?

"You may call me, La Volpe."

Then you stab them in the face with your knife, and go do some parkour to meet Ezio in the marketplace of Florence.

I need GOOD COMEBACKS when someone calls me a slut.?

Girls:

"You look like one yourself."
"And I'm the slut?"
"Well, your an ugly (You can choose your swear word here)"

Guys:

"You're just an ugly (You can choose your swear word here)"
"I wouldn't be talking."
"You look like one yourself."

You know, in a way, Pianist is right. I mean, I hope my comebacks help, :), but, in the future, you should probably take matters in your own hands and ignore them. If people are calling YOU the slut, they are probably insecure of themselves and make fun of you to make themselves feel better. And if people are encouraging them, then that makes you feel 10 times worse. I am really curious as to where this rumor started and why, but for now, I'll just say that you should probably ignore the rumor and live life to the fullest. I had a couple rumors about me in 6th grade, people teased my hair, how tall I was(Which wasn't very tall at all) and other physical features, but people soon recognized my emotional features and quickly befriended me. Besides, worse casinario, the rumor lasts from one day to 1 month. Then another pointless one will come by and you'll be all set.

Any Good Comebacks After Being Called a Noob?

there is not any extra positive comeback than silence. it really is uncomplicated to fall into the catch of wondering that in case you humiliate a number of those human beings adequate that they are going to end calling you names and such. they quite do not care, they only prefer to blame their personal mess united stateson someone except themselves. do not provide them the delight, worst case state of affairs you're only giving them ammo to document you.

How do you respond when someone calls you an idiot?

That is not one of the epithets people usually use for me. I am female, opinionated, older and well-educated without losing my common sense but in the rare few times someone has referred to me in that manner, I have known that the person wielding the insulting word was very unforgiving of my stance on some topic which s/he felt passionately about and just knew I was so wrong when I did not agree with him/her. I prefer not to participate in such name-calling and passionately fanatical exercises so I generally walk away and leave the person to their particular form of madness/ignorance/misunderstanding and retain my sanity and not spew forth words I cannot take back. I have learned in my 60+ years that a person must come to their own understanding and my passionate defense is not going to sway them so I do not waste my time exchanging harsh words or even blows. If I can’t walk away, I try to diffuse the situation with logic or simply ask them why they feel the way they do and if they can prove themselves “right” I will consider amending my view.

Good comeback when people call you a terrorist?

People in my old school, used to call me a packie, so i called them whitey's..... and I got suspended temporarily for "being racist". :L If they are being horrible, go kick a.s.s girl! It was worth the punishment to see their faces when i fought back :L x