Can Children Live At A Factory Their Parents Own

Why do a lot of people think that to live with your parents is bad?

There are some legitimate reasons to it, and some irrelevant.For some, it’s because parents have always seen them as a kid, no matter if they are 6 foot tall, or a hot shot for the outside world. Hence, as that kid grows, he/she would like to make some decisions, that makes them feel good. But since some parents are still stuck upon the very thought that it’s their KID, that would be difficult.For some, it’s to have their own space. Surprisingly, that’s a phrase mostly used to relationship stuff. But this is very much applicable to the current question too. As children, we want to have a space that belongs us, that is in accordance to us. And with parents, in a family, that would be a difficult thing to do. That’s why you would see many, not mostly, complaining about life after marriage, in a joint family.For some, living with parents is an obstruction to all the crap they wanna do, out of the vibes that they get from the outside world. For example, With parents, you can’t go drunk weirdly, smoke freely or do any such “shouldn’t be done in front of parents” stuff. So that’s why, these people are so very much against the idea of living with parents.For rest, they are just following the over hyped, totally corrupted meaning of the word Independent. Yes, living with your parents makes you dependent, you’re not self-sufficient, asking money from them shall make you a shrewd, under performing offspring. Atleast according to people. This people are blinded by an idea, which is being followed by many people, for totally different reasons as compared to the definition they provide.Overall, I love staying with my parents, and involving them more or less in every aspect of my life. Apparently, life is spelled as FAMILY for me ;)

What factors have led to the increase of adult children still living in their parents home?

When I was young, most high school graduates looked forward to finding a job right out of high school. For most women, the job would most likely be a temporary one, until she got married. Then she would quit her job and begin a family to become a stay at home mom while her husband held the job to support them and their growing families..There is not one area in living expenses that has not sky-rocketed out of proportion in reference to what a new grad or adult children have to cover. To me, the worst of these is health care. It is atrociously high, especially from hospitals that claim a high prestige. However, not only is health care ridiculously high, so is the cost of higher education. The load of just paying off student loans will take a huge chunk out of the newly graduated college student’s beginning salary.I could go right down the list to other things that young people of one or two generations ago did not cover; however, it is clear that with just two areas of life so high, other areas of life will follow suit.My sympathies go to those young people who have to face financial challenges that I never did and many generations of others who never did. The rich are getting richer, I hear. Is the middle class growing smaller?

Do Chinese still believe in raising children for old age (养儿防老) today given that many children working far away cannot look after their parents?

Chinese where?This outdated belief worked for agrarian societies that held the idea that the more children one had, the more access to cheap, exploitable labor one would have.Hell, you & your wife are literally the workforce factory!Large Chinese populations that live in modern industrial nations would have learnt by now to discard those beliefs in favor of putting their fewer kids through higher education.Hopefully, those offspring will somehow secure well-paying professional work and become independent.

What is the everyday life of a Chinese family like?

I teach at a university in China and also live on campus, with other teachers or workers (I have my own apartment though) so I'm surrounded by Chinese families all the time, and I can see everyday how they have such a peculiar setup. First of all, the funny thing is, they always keep their doors open (I live in a building) and they casually drop in to someone else's apartment without even saying "Hey, what's up? Can I chill here for a bit?". They just come in and literally act like it's their own apartment. I was a little uneasy the first time it happened to me, I guess that's a communist thing, although China is far from being communist. (But that's for a different thread- nonetheless, some  public toilets still have no walls or doors separating them..)So, back to the family topic, the people you see during the day are almost always going to be "nainai" = grandma or "yeye" = grandpa, looking after their grandchildren. The typical family has both parents working, and the wife's parents living in house.Wife and husband go to work and the grandparents take care of buying  the meat and vegetables in the morning (just enough for one day to make sure it's always fresh), they cook, clean, pick up the kids from school, play with them etc. A lot of my friends in their twenties told me they loved their grandparents as much as their parents, if not more!Basically, the parents get married, they have kids (or just one kid really) and let their own parents do the parenting work. And then the cycle goes on. But that's just -sort of- a typical Chinese family. There are rich-er families who don't live with their in-laws and have totally different lifestyles, or the migrant workers who go to the cities to make money for a few years, and probably won't see their loved ones more than once a year maximum. (For spring festival, the biggest human migration in the world. But I guess that's for another topic :p) There's so much to say about China! After all, it is one fifth of the world's population.

Should all parents automatically kick their kids out on the street at 18? Aren't kids these days too coddled?

Only you can tell for certain if you have been too soft on your children. It would be wonderful if child knew exactly what they wanted to be, what they wanted to do, what they had the physical and mental resources to accomplish unaided. But happily are as different as any one else. What a bore life would be if we were all automatons….My youngest son still lives with us, but for all intents and purposes he is on his own. He contributes to the household food and utilities as well as a portion of the mortgage payment. His brother owns the house, his room is on our side, and he has two other brothers who live in the other apartment, it’s a duplex.So who is taking care of who? One of my sons owns the house. We contribute to the mortgage and utilities, All of which are in my sons name. He is responsible for snow removal, and landscape care, so we must have done something incredibly right. Oh yeah, we loved them. Didn’t try to impose our religious beliefs on them, answered questions, didn’t fight over hair length, color or body piercings.No drug addicts, no gang members, no criminal records, no teenage parents, no serial killers, all college educated, all honestly employed…. not too shabby…. but ya gotta love them through there tough times too, and not bury them in your own guilt and grief. They are the finest men I know.