Can The Mother Of My Child Keep Me From Knowing Where She Is Living Or From Speaking To Her Threw

My 15 year old daughter keeps trying to kill herself, i don't know how to cope anymore?

Please call the suicide hotline, they will talk to you any hour of the day or night!

YOU are a good MOM.
YOU did not know about the abuse when it was happening.
Validate her feelings, and ask her how you can help her?
Is she having flash backs?
Is she sleeping?
Does she have to see this Uncle?

The Holidays are filled with major anxiety and memories of family gatherings wondering if the "uncle" will be there, and will she be protected and respected as an adult.

IM me if you need to chat with someone who's an incest survivor! It gets better, with therapy, reading the correct books, and doing the work book for me really validated everything I was feeling.

Just hold her, tell her you love her, and that you will never let anyone ever hurt her in that way again.
(if she pushes away, pull her close, and rock her)

I would consider another counsiler. It took me 3 before I found one i was comfortable with.

I don't want to go into too much private info.
IM or Email.
I'll be glad to help, and give you survivor hotlines.

(my brother completed suicide when i was 35 and he was 33 1/2. I miss him so much. He too was abused by a nieghbor)
**40 yrs ago we just didn't talk about these sort of things.
Be grateful she is crying out for help and has told you.

Reassure her that the worst is in the past.
That you will protect her, and never have contact with that Uncle.

Please IM or email me,, I will get back to you tomorrow if you are not online now.

Save a life, and live your life.
She needs good doctors, and therapist to help her thru this difficult time.
What does she want to do?
Has she reported?
that is an option and may impower her.
It's all about her, not the uncle. If you side or try to protect the uncle, you are blaming and shaming her.

I wish my brother would have talked to me, and I to him about our sexual abuse, but......we hid our secrets.

I'm glad your daughter came out and told you, now accept it, and let's figure out how to learn to live with it!

Lilly aka Mystic_Gift @yahoo.com IM and email the same.

My mother keeps going through my stuff... advice?

Talk to your mother about this. be calm and nice. Tell her that you appreciate her caring so much about you but that she raised you right and she can trust you.

A lock on your door may be needed. If not that, how about a locked box or file? You can get two drawer locking file cabinets that can double as a bedside take or a desk with locking drawers.

If you can afford it, you can go on and get a nice antique chest of drawers, dresser, or chest or a hope chest or cedar chest that you can someday take to your own home. It used to be a tradition that girls got locking chests when they graduated from high school.
Good idea!

Single mom needs help with disapplining my child!!!?

i would say that its just because she is three. they all do that at this age. what we do with my three year old boy is to pull the big boy card. if he does not behave we tell him he is acting like a baby. if telling him that does not work we start to take away all his big boy toys. his v-smile or spider man bike. things like that. it works and we give the things back to him once he starts to act like a big boy and behave.

Will the judge speak with the child?

First of all you MUST remember that your case (even though it seems it is) is not anything abnormal. Child custody can be a very ugly thing. The next thing you need to remember is that the judge sees this mess everyday, he/she knows what is and isn't the truth, he/she knows if a child is/is not coerced into saying something. The judges might/might not ask to speak to the child, depends on the situation and what your lawyers bring to the table. I will tell you what the judge won't like, and that is the fact that the ex is using the child as bait...........you do this or you wont get this. Does she have control issues? Sounds like she is already breaking the "family code" and the judge will look down on her for that. He will reprimand her and he will not look too kindly upon it. A child needs to have both parents in his/her life, and denying access to the non-custodial parent is ony hurting the child(ren). Regardless of if the parents can or cannot be cordial is not the question, the question is "what is in the best interest of the child?" I know that this is scary, but trust me, it will all work out and everything will be okay. Don't give up, keep fighting and don't listen to what the mother says, take her threats with a grain of salt, journal EVERYTHING and have your lawyer produce it in court. I would also ask for a "geographic restriction" because if she is threatening you with not being able to see the child, it is certain she will pick up and leave and you guys not being able to see the child on a regular basis, in the event that this situation happens, your husband will still be liable for all child support payments. So, the BM gets custody, child support and your husband gets the "short end of the stick". Maybe you guys should think about asking for joint managing conservatorship with your husband being the custodial parent. In lehman terms, that means both mom and dad have joint custody, but the child lives with the dad. You say that "the child has always lived with her mom" Just because this is how it has been doesnt necessarily mean that it is in her (the child's) best interest. Something to take into consideration. My husband had this problem with the ex, we took it to court and WE walked out with the kids :). ~Good luck~ Hope my words gave you some encouragement!

My mom is bringing strange men she meets online into her home & children are present..it gets worse-?

Your mom is putting her kids at risk of sexual or physical abuse AGAIN through her actions. And she's certainly putting you all through emotional abuse--you know it, or you wouldn't be writing here.

Unfortunately, there doesn't seem to be a lot of options for you guys, based on what you've written here. If you have responsible grandparents, or other responsible relatives, I think you should ask if the lot of you can go live with them--especially the 5-year-old.

I don't think there's anything that CPS is going to do, just based on your mom boffing strangers in her home. But I think it's a mistake for you to rule out calling them if there's a legitimate danger to yourself, or the other kids. Yes, she's your mother, and she may be all you've got. But you wouldn't keep a pet rattlesnake, just because it's your only pet option, and you shouldn't use that justification for keeping helpless kids in their destructive mother's home, either.

Why do mothers stop kids seeing their dads?

I have two friends (male) who never get to see their kids either and like your father are waiting until they're children are old enough as the mothers made it impossible for them to see their kids (not turning up and the courts doing nothing about it/lieing about them in court etc and basically just doing anything and everything to keep them apart, even (like you said) turning the children against them). It's very sad but it does happen a lot, and yes the law was NO help at all! Plus the court fees almost bankrupt them. (None of their ex's worked so they were ok). The child maintenance were quick to take they're money for kids they never see though. This is why there is such a thing as fathers for justice. Because right now there is NO justice for them.

Macenzie you said "Why do dads sometimes take kids and not let the mom see them?" Over here in the UK and most places, if a dad took the kids from momma he would be locked up. Only the mother is allowed to steal the kids. It's the law.