Do you believe that the people we attract are a reflection of our own selves?
Not exactly. After a fair amount of reflection (thinking about it), I came to understand that I am attracted to the familiar. In my young life growing up, I was exposed to many people, but mostly my family. I became habituated to their personality traits through their actions. In fact I became very finely tuned to the most subtle actions of all kinds.Then, as I matured and ventured into the community, I found many people who behaved, well, differently. Not surprising. At first, I was attracted to people that “looked” familiar, and less to people who were less familiar. Of course, my growing familiarity created new “looks” of attraction.But underneath it all, nothing can replace the old and deep habits of my youth. These remain, although I many not think about them, or remember them with any detail. In fact, I might not have liked my early family life at all. It does not matter. The conditioning is firmly in place.So, the people I attract are people who see in me subtle cues, subtle actions and reactions that fit their most deeply ingrained familiarities.They do the same for me.
Do people tend to think they're more attractive than they actually are?
Those who think they are attractive often find it easy to attract the opposite sex.Those who don’t think they are attractive find it difficult to attract the opposite sex due to their low self-esteem.The level of self-confidence often determines the level at which they see themselves attractive. And the level varies from person to person. Because the level of self-confidence varies from person to person.Here’s how I work around it to get best results:When I see the hottest girl - the girl I find most attractive like her:I tell my self I am the most attractive guy on this planet. And I deserve her. I am more attractive than guys like this fellaOr like this oneOkay.. last one.. before my self-confidence breaks ;)“They don’t even stand a chance with me around”And you won’t believe this mindset helps, a lot.But when it comes to people starting to praise me of my confidence saying “ I am handsome. Good Looking blah blah” ( I still don’t know why they say so) I revert to being my humble guy and say.“ I don’t even stand a chance competing with you guys”I look like.. well..No competition. I am the most unattractive man now.
Spiritually speaking, are we all just mirror reflections of each other?
Like we see pieces and interconnecting parts of one another in ourselves, and that is why we subconsciously condition ourselves from a young age to only share 'deep' stuff with people we trust, because of the risk of rejection? Likewise, when we see a person confident in themselves it is easier for us to feel good about ourselves....but if we see fear in another, if we are afraid of the same thing, we sometimes feel the need to distance ourselves from that person, and if we are ready to tackle that fear we are drawn to that person so we can release that fear for good? This question I am asking has many layers when I start thinking about it. Thoughts anyone? FYI: The thing that sparked my curiosity for all of this was because I heard about a study that said Steven Colbert's audience (no matter their ideology) thought his jokes were made about the "other" party, i.e. democrats feel that his jokes are made at the expense of republicans, and republicans feel that his jokes are made at the expense of democrats. Its like we only see what we want to see!! It is almost as if he is a mirror...when he uses his satire he leaves us the room to fill in the blanks and decipher it for ourselves.
Do mirrors make you look more or less attractive than you really are like a bathroom mirror?
It depends on the mirror. Many cheap mirrors have imperfections or waves that make you look odd. Also a lot depends on the lighting. Realise that all of life is not lighted like a bathroom. You can always tell a woman who did her face in the bathroom, they use far too much makeup to compensate for poor lighting. Also--who decided it was a good idea to put flourescent lights in fitting rooms in stores? Flourescents may be cheaper and use less energy, but they change the colours of fabrics etc and point up every little flaw, wrinkle, cellulite or what have you in your skin. They also wash the colour out of your face. So if you are looking at yourself in a mirror under flourescent lighting, you are seeing yourself a lot worse than you really are.
We do not attract what we want, we attract what we are. What does this quote mean?
I only came upon this quote/philosophy recently, thanks in no small way to Marilyn Manson’s new album and same titled song ‘ Heaven Upside Down’. Having read this quote, and upon due reflection, I have to say I have come to agree, deeply…, with this quote, and with the other comments and explanations presented here.I would go one step further perhaps… in saying ‘we attract what we are’, ergo: it’s not just about the people we attract or the job we have but everything in our life (bar blood relatives and family) that is then a reflection of ‘what we are’. If we care to look around at how we live, what we eat, our possessions, where and how we frequent, and how we dress, what we read, or don;t read etc… in a word, the make-up of one’s life both inwardly and outwardly…. all of this was (generally) chosen by us, either by design or by default at one stage, according to our personality and psychological make-up. I use the word ‘chosen’ as in a lazy way…. some things in our life, we choose to allow into our life…. we tolerate that our way of life/what we are attracts such things - ‘I think I have a hankering for classical baroque music, but I’m too embarrassed or lazy or ignorant right now to apply myself to it, therefor I’ll stick to the Top 50 on FM Radio’.Correct me here, but what we are is who we are at any given moment, but we are capable, both positively, and negatively, of changing our minds, and thus our world that orbits our own selves? But is this a nature or nurture thing? I adore strong dark clothing, but is that because of my nature ingrained in me…in my psychological settings, or have I garnered this love over time? Eitherway, My like of things has attracted like to me, and likewise repels others (some of these other I think I would want in my life, but perhaps have nothing in common with me).Lastly, I would personally suggest to everyone, at differing stages in your life, look about at your possessions, the people you know, what you eat, how you live, read etc…. - this is a reflection on who and what you are. This is the picture other people see and are either attracted to, or not. I’m not saying I’m absolutely right, but it’s how I see myself now. We are a mirror of our own selves.
I think I look really attractive in the mirror, but when I take a picture I look so bad and different. Do I look like how I look in the mirror? I understand that my face is reversed, but will that really make a huge impact on how I look in reality?
Relax! You will be relieved to know that when other people look at you in real life, they are more likely to see what you see when you look in a mirror (without the reversal) rather than what you look like on phone pictures.Why? Three reasons, which are all to do with the laws of optics and perspective:Number of aperturesA phone camera has a single aperture, which means it can only view your face from a single point. But (most) people can see with both eyes, so they are seeing you with two apertures spaced a bit of a part, and their brain then combines these images to produce a more complete image of you, with more of your facial features being visible than through a single aperture.Depth perceptionAlso, of course, they will see a three-dimensional image of you, rather than the two-dimensional image obtained through a single aperture; they will perceive the depth and shape of different features of your face (as you do when you look at yourself in a mirror)—information that is not available in a flat two-dimensional image.Viewing distanceFinally, if you are taking a selfie, or someone else is taking a picture of you from quite close-up (say, no more than 4 feet away), the closeness of this single aperture to your face will tend to produce an image which looks rather distorted when compared with a picture taken from a greater distance. This distortion will make your face look more rounded (albeit a two-dimensional projection of this roundness), with your nose—being closer to the lens—appearing quite large and your ears—being further away from the lens—appearing smaller. Viewed from a greater distance, your face will appear less distorted, with the relative proportions of your various features in more realistic relationships to each other.To summarise, then, if you want to have a more realistic idea of how you look to other people, stop taking so many selfies, because they will never show you at your best!
Why do I look more attractive in the mirror?
It depends on the mirror and the room.If you’re looking at a bathroom or a pocket mirror, you’d likely get closer, thus your facial structure will be more apparent. If your face is lit in a certain way, your face will appear more angular, or flat, depending on the strength and position of the light.Many smartphone/digital cameras get programmed to even-out human complexion. Coupled with the low resolution, you’d get very flat images:Here’s a good image of Ronaldo:You can see that his face isn’t as flat as in the first picture.These settings are put to avoid pictures like this:Human skin swallows light.That’s why photographers must use very elaborate lighting and makeup just so the image can appear halfway natural. Our eyes are much better at that, so its logical that you look better in the mirror than in photos.Scarlett’s face seems to be a bit oily because they had to use heavy lighting. She’s probably much better looking in person than in this picture.Most of us are like that and its not because we’re all ugly, so don’t worry.
When you look in the mirror, are you more or less attractive than others see you?
Do you have a brother or a sister? People are telling that you look as your brother/sister? But somehow you don’t see any part of his/her face simillar to the face you are wearing from birth to this moment?Few days back I was thinking about siblings who don’t see any simillarities with each other, but other people always are saying “you are original picture of him/her”.And then I came to the conclusion that usually siblings don’t see any resemblance because they are looking each other in a detail.They don’t look each other as a whole, they spend so much time staring at that face over and over again same as they are looking at themselves in a mirror, they could easely tell the difference between them.When I look at myself in a mirror I see every detail. I could easely tell that my hair was better looking the other day and that my lips are dry.That’s why people tend to forget stranger’s face, it’s because they don’t pay attention to the construction. They could not pick a picture of that person’s nose from a bunch of others because they don’t know how that person look in a detail(nose, lips, shape…) they saw that person as a picture-as a whole.So, I would say I see myself less attractive than others do.