Does The Tentative And Vulnerable Condition Of Human And Other Life Forms Indicate That Life

Why would a man disclose his 'issues' or choose to be vulnerable with you, and why do they avoid you afterwards only to reach out again?

There’s a few different reasons why men are tentative about sharing their emotions. Judging by the link and type of question asked I’m assuming that you are a women and the man you’re referring to is a romantic interest, or at least a hopeful one.1.) It makes them vulnerable Yes, this can be very beneficial for close intimate relationships and generally women are better at this then men. However, it also comes with a trade off.2.) Being vulnerable can make you seem weak Imagine a situation where a man was in a soldiers battalion. He burst out crying from the fear of dying as he heads headstrong into battle. This is a very serious risk to his chances of winning the battle as well as his own as well as his whole battalion's life.3.) Men and Women have different strengths resulting from tradeoffs Now trying to be close to this man might be painful, however his behavior is useful in other facets of life. Not revealing your emotions can be useful in negotiations at work for example.I understand this is probably painful as you feel this lack of expressing emotions to you is an obstacle to your intimacy, but is also useful in other situations in his life, and I have only discussed biological reasons and haven’t even touched on cultural. It really is a complicated topic that you bring up with your question really.Also, at least in my personal experience, women are less attracted when I do open up with them and share more intimate thoughts or feelings. In my situation, she wanted me to be strong and reliable, not vulnerable.As to why he comes back and leaves again, he’s probably conflicted. On one hand he understands the cultural norms of men being vulnerable not being accepted, as well as his own biological inclinations towards that stoicism.On the other hand, he is human and does feel vulnerable and does crave intimacy like you do, so in that sense it’s a catch 22.Hope this helps and good luck! :)~Cheers

Is it a mental disorder when someone is feeling emotional pain but can not show it or, when they want to share what's going inside with others, something inside tells them it is fake and should not open up? Is it depression or something else?

I don’t believe that what you described is a mental disorder at all. I would simply describe this as “mistrust” in others paired with anxiety of how others might view you when you have shared your emotional pain with them.I think weve all experienced this at one point or another in our lives. Sometimes we’re afraid to tell others the pain we’re going through because a) it might be something that we feel ashamed about b) we might be judged negatively for our pain and/or c) the other person won’t understand my pain so what’s the point? One or all of these could potentially stop someone from opening up.Also, it’s very hard to open up generally. Yes some people are blessed with being able to tell their darkest secrets without hesitation. But I’d argue that MOST people have a hard time dealing with this. You have to be very vulnerable with someone to be able to talk to them about a deep pain you’re experiencing, and that can be a very difficult thing due to the reasons I mentioned above. Sometimes it takes months, years, and even decades for people to open up about pain they've experienced in their life. So please do not feel as if you’re “weird” for feeling this way, when you’d be surprised how many others do.On a side note, telling others about your pain is extremely beneficial! It’s part of the healing process, and it is worth the anxiety that comes along with it. It is a sense of release to be able to open up about pain so I highly recommend doing that with someone you trust. If you do not have a friend or family member who you can speak to (some of us don’t have that), I would recommend going to a professional such as a counselor or therapist to speak about it. And if that isn’t an option either, WRITE IT DOWN! Write everything down on a piece of paper and then afterwards, rip it up and never look at it again!Good luck and I hope whatever is causing you pain will soon be put in the past :)

Why do people with BPD often feel the need to overshare?

Why do people with BPD often feel the need to overshare?This is a fascinating question! I think that the tendency of people with Borderline Personality adaptations to overshare has to do with the interaction of some of the following factors:Instant IntimacyMany of my Borderline clients bond very quickly with new people—sometimes before they have taken the time to check out that the other person shares their feelings.Few BoundariesUnlike my Schizoid clients who can be quite secretive, and my Narcissistic clients who want to manage their self-image; many of my Borderline clients do not do much filtering of what they say. They want to share intimate details with other people. This is one of the ways they use to get close to others.ImpulsivityMy Borderline clients tend to lead with their emotions. They often act on what they feel, without thinking through the consequences.TrustingSome of my Borderline clients are too trusting. They may assume they are safe when they are not. They want to believe that other people are good, so they sometimes overlook any indications that they should be more cautious about what they are saying.Compulsion to “Confess”Many of my clients report that it is very hard for them not to reveal everything about themselves to new friends or lovers on the first date. They are likely to tell relative strangers about their childhood traumas, the time they were raped, and all their anxieties.Conclusion: This type of oversharing and instant bonding is so common among my Borderline clients (and friends) that its presence can alert me that someone may be coming from a Borderline “place.”A2AElinor Greenberg, PhD, CGPIn private practice in NYC and the author of the book: Borderline, Narcissistic, and Schizoid Adaptations: The Pursuit of Love, Admiration, and Safety.www.elinorgreenberg.com

What is meant by life and its existence?

From my perspective, life is a wonderful gift and an amazing journey. It is meant to be enjoyed and lived fully. As Henry Miller says it,Life has to be given a meaning because of the obvious fact that it has no meaning.Some of the things that i truly believe is meant for or important for life are;Love it is a basic instinct and survival need. Without love there will be no humanity.2. Goals, everyone needs to have some sort of goal In life, to achieve something or become something. You need to clearly know what you want and do not stop until you have achieved it.3. Money, money is not everything in life. When compared to happiness, it is on a lesser scale.4. Happiness, being happy and healthy should be ones life's wisest priorities. If there is no happiness and health, then there is no life.5. Relationships are meant for life. You create, nourish and cherish them. Relationships should be valued, build on trust and support.6. Helping one another, beings someone else's sunlight in times of their darkness and being hope for humanity.7. Adventure, life is meant for adventures, whether big or small. It is fun to travel and experience new things.There are 7 billion people in the world, each of those 7 billion people are meant for unique and beautiful life's. It is up to them, what they want to choose, what to let go and which path to walk upon.