Help me please i am getting so upset over this!!?
right i really like my ex and he has been speaking about me to his mates but recently he has been really horrible telling his mates to tell me he dont care and that he used and lied to me now im all upset by it and i have been crying every night over this pathetic i know but i cant help it my head is saying move on you can do better but my heart just wont let go because i know this isnt really him HELP PLZ!!
I get so upset when my boyfriend drinks...?
He doesn't drink too often, but when he does it just makes me so mad...the thought of him drinking goes right through me... I guess it's wrong of me to get so upset, but I can't help it...I don't want to let him know it makes me mad because it's so dumb and I don't want to seem "controlling." Should I just learn to deal or should I confront him about how I feel?
Why do I get so upset over old people?
A new charity has opened online which provides a place for lonely old people to call up if they want a chat. My mum suggested me and her become volunteers as we both have spare time each week to talk to someone who is lonely and in need of a chat however I can't help feel that I will get upset when I talk to them. I don't know what it is but the thought of old people lonely at home makes me well up and although I desperately want to help them I don't want to make them feel any worse by bursting into tears when I'm on the phone to them? What should I do? Is this normal for a teenager to get upset over this?!
I can't control myself when I get angry, what can I do to help this?
I can't control myself when I get angry, what can I do to help this?Please don’t say count to ten, or think before you act because I react first and then regret it laterAnger is a complex emotion, and can cause numerous problems in our lives. However it is also necessary to protect us from physical and emotional injury, and it mobilizes our defenses very effectively.Learning to manage anger is a process, and can take time and effort. A healing therapy relationship may also be helpful or even necessary.There can be physical factors that generate or exacerbate anger, such as low glucose levels, hormonal imbalances, drugs, alcohol, pain or injury, etc. Those can be ruled out through medical exam, etc.Anger management is a process of education, self-awareness, identifying red flags, avoiding problematic situations when possible, and really doing a head-to-toes analysis of your life, experiences, relationships, patterns, beliefs, expectations, habits, etc.Anger as most of us know it, arises from our beliefs, perceptions, expectations, and also from persistent anxiety or other threatening or painful feelings, such as fear or shame. People do NOT like to feel anxious, and they will rid themselves of that feeling as quickly as possible. Thus if you are in a hurry much of the time, things or people that slow you down will become the target of frustration and anger, because when we are hurrying and delayed, we tend to become anxious and will attempt to use anger to remove obstacles, thereby reducing anxiety.Shame is often the driver of uncontrollable anger, and healing from a shaming upbringing is a long and difficult process. I have written about shame on Quora, and I can recommend John Bradhaw's book "Healing the shame that binds you".If you can't control yourself when angry, then you must avoid the situations in which you typically get angry. Anger can wreak havoc on relationships, careers, and lives. If you don't learn to control it, eventually it will be controlled for you in very unpleasant ways.I hope that is helpful. Cheers.
Feeling really guilty and upset? ?
Well done you for making yourself get through that! Be proud of yourself!! Answer those feelings of "I shouldn't have, I'm fat" with "You are just lies, yes I should have an dI did and I am happy about it!......I have done well, I am now normal, I am going to have more of this because to be normal, I will enjoy it! Well done, ME!! Dessert is a good thing twice a week!" Things like that.....deny slimming and hating self talk. Nurture yourself by making yourself disbelieve your feelings and dwell on the truth statements you should be getting from your therapist so they become so real to you that you can see the other thoughts as the lies that they are..... Things like..... "Well, if I am fat, why are the clothes that should fit for my normal healthy weight, falling off me?" "My perception of myself and what is normal has been distorted, I have gotten used to a body/size and weight that isn't right. This is a perception I have to work at undoing." "Just feeling full is not dangerous to me, it;s time to get used to that feeling." "Starving myself is not the right way to reduce the stress to a manageable level." My will power is quite capable of starving me, and the result of that is death. I do not want to die." "Mental/emotional health is worth the effort needed." "The euphoric feeling of being back in control is not actually correct, just my feelings deceiving me...I am going to have to do what is right, even though at the moment it is feeling wrong." Hope some of those help, and well done girl! Mel
Why do some people get all kinds of moeny to help them though school and other people get none?
I am so upset my parents both died I am 22 and on my whon I got denide a cheep place to live becuse I whant to try and finsh school I got denid money for school becuse I made 7,000 all of whent to mentl help for me to deal whith abouse form my child hood so many other people get all kinds of money I have tried all kinds of schoolershipes but I always get tound doun I have worked for 7 years whith in the same compane and only get paid 6.25 and have to bust my but. What did I do wong to be dinde what others can get so easaly.
I get so mad when I don't get my way?
I have had anger issues in the past. It's something that you need to WANT to fix. You are still very young, but you have to except when people don't want to do what you want to do - remember - as harsh as it sounds - it's not always about you. I had to realize that in order to start getting past my anger issues. Talking to a professional does help. Just because you go talk to someone, doesn't mean that you are crazy. Take it from me, you want to seek help before it gets out of hand. My anger got so angry that one day I put my fist in a mirror. My VERY low point was when I struck my boyfriend. My anger started out just as yours does - it will get worse if you don't seek help now. It ruins relationships and it pushes people away - the ones you care about most. I was lucky that my boyfriend stuck by me, and helped me get help. Go talk with someone. Your anger is only going to bring you down, and in the end you'll be alone. Remember - just because you are talking to someone doesn't mean that you are crazy. That's why it took me so long to get help, I didn't want to be viewed as "crazy" and when my doc put me on medication - I felt crazy, but I have gotten past it all, and am much happier! I don't have my anger issues anymore and I am without the meds!
Why do some people get easily affected (upset) by little things? How can s/he resolve this?
As a general rule of thumb you can take it that the less control people have in their own life, the easier they are affected by what is happening around them.We only become upset by triggers that “bring the pot to boil over”. Which usually occur when we have had a very stressful time and/or when we do not have enough control in our own life, making it so stressful.These two things go almost hand in hand, as it is likely that you will have a stressful time when you are not in control and not being in control causes a lot more stressful factors to run amok.Think about it: if you had all the control over your own life, would you ever get upset by something small going wrong? After all, you have the power to change it, so why does it matter?The reason so many people get so upset about all these tiny things is simply because they are not aware that they have the power to change almost everything about their life!Obviously there are accidents and things that are out of our control, but even then we have the power to decide how we react to those things and to change them, or at least fight them.To really get control back in your life all you must do is actively decide on what you want to do rather than to react to what is happening.People that overreact to certain things let their emotions get the better of them during those times, even though they do not need to. You have the power to decide whether or not you want to react to an emotion or whether or not you just want to sit back and do something different.The difficulty in this comes when we are not aware of this power and do not think about it, making our emotions take control.Learn to actively decide on what you want by:Being intentional before you go into an argument/situation.Keeping your eye on the prize. AKA what you want to get out at the end.Reminding yourself that you are not a slave to your emotions.In the end, it you can react either way. You can take everything personally, decide that every little thing has huge problems it brings with it, or you can decide to take a deep breath, step back and look at the problem from an optimistic point of view.Stop being less than you can be and reach your goals. Send me a message saying "1 to 1" to get life coaching with me. Lukas Schwekendiek