How can I help my 6-year-old daughter to stop lying?
I’ve been struggling with this one myself.A few days ago, I heard my daughter (age 7) tell my son (age 3) that he was really bad at the game they were playing together. I called her out of the room, and asked her how she thought it would make him feel.She said “But I didn’t say that.”I said “Layla, I heard you say that.”She said “I didn’t, I didn’t say that!” and started crying.I said “Layla, remember how we’ve talked about lying, and how it is really important to me that you always tell me the truth?” I added, “I’m not going to get mad at you, whatever you did, and it would make me really happy if you could tell me the truth.”She said “But I am telling the truth! Why are you lying, saying that I said that when I didn’t?!”Now she was next to hysterical, and ran to her room and slammed the door.It was hard for me to tell if she was 1) genuine, and truly believed that she hadn’t said that her brother was really bad at the game, or 2) an incredibly good liar. Since I have seen her attempt to lie in other situations (and she’s really not very good), I’m inclined to go with 1.A few minutes later I went in to see her. She was still extremely angry with me, but I suggested that we do a “do-over”, and pretend our argument had never happened. She happily agreed, and snuggled into my arms.So I’m not sure I have a good answer for you - only that teaching honesty is an incredibly challenging process with some kids, and it’s not clear that every kid is really ready to understand “truth” by age 6 (or even age 7).
Six year old stepson is touching my three yr old son?
about a yr or so ago my stepson told a teacher at school that his mothers then boyfriend had touched his penis when he put him to bed. Child services were called and the case was closed saying he had lied about it. I had caught him playing with himself and sticking his fingers in himself. i told mt husband who is his father and he told the boys mother and she said she knows and when she catches him masterbating she tells him to let her know when he is done and he can come out. she has been brushing off counseling saying she cannot afford it and nothing is wrong with him.. this weekend i caught my 3yr old and him locked in my stepsons bedroom in a storage compartment with their pants down and my stepson was claiming they were smelling each others butts. i dismissed this but kept an eye on them, a while later they went quite again and the same thing, the door was shut so i stood by the door this time listening and my 3 yr old kept saying i want to go out no more na dmy stepson kept saying come here i want to smell your butt and was pulling him on the floor, i opened the door and my mother in law saw this to, i asked my 3 yr old what are u doing and he said his brother was smelling and licking his butt. we repremanded them for this and said it is unacceptable.. we are going to tell his mother today but i feel that this is a problem. i will not allow this in my house as first of all it is incest. should i get in touch with child services as there was already a case and let them know what is going on? my stepson also says he hates him mom and does not want to go home and hits and kicks her and tells her he hates her..what should i do?
How can I help my 12-year-old daughter stop lying?
It may be good to sit down with your daughter and have a good long discussion.My daughter is 11. I talk to her like I would talk to my best friend. I am completely honest and open with her about everything. I tell her if she has any questions about anything, she can feel safe to come to me and ask away.I was apprehensive about being so open with her at first. However, these kids now days learn everything from their friends at school anyway. And the television, radio, school, other parents…It is impossible to shield your child from the world and it's knowledge, be it good or bad.What you want to happen, is to open a solid line of communication and trust with your daughter. If she feels that she can trust you, she will cease with lying.Lying usually stems from fear, a longing for your admiration, self-esteem issues and other.Make her some hot chocolate and sit down with her. On her level. This will make her feel comfortable.Begin with stories about how- “When I was 7 and got caught in a lie…” and “These were the consequences of my lying.” (And) “I don't wish for you to have to go through the same struggles.”You get the floor first to speak. Then sit back and listen to the magic happen.When you open up to your child completely and they sense your sincerity they will open up too.You might be taken back by some of the blunt honesty she will bring. Do not, I repeat, do not discourage or make negative statements about a word of it. Just soak it in.Ask her why she felt the need to lie. Something is amiss. Let your daughter know you are a safe place for her to go.This will work. It takes time so be patient. She needs to fully be able to trust you. Somewhere, somehow, something in your daughters life has affected her in a way that she's lost a sense of security. Allow her to find that security in you.
My stepson keeps lying and stealing!?
My stepson is 12yrs. and just came to live with us 2 months ago. I know that he has had a difficult up bringing with him mom and stepdad and 2 sisters and we have him in counceling now. Problem is he lies and steals more than any kid I have ever seen. Sometimes it is small things like candy, other times it has been money. Each time we confront him about something we know he has done, his first response is to lie his way out of it. He always says he is sorry after he knows he is caught, but I believe "I'm sorry" only works if you say it the first time you do something wrong and then realize you made a bad choice and don't do it again. He keeps doing it, so I don't believe he is sorry. I know he is just acting the way his mom and stepdad raised him to act, but this can't continue. What is the appropriate punishment to put a stop to this? Please don't say spanking, because given what this child has been through before, that is not a good solution in this case.
My 15-year-old son lies to me constantly.?
two words - drivers license My son turned 16 last month. When he was 15, the best form of discipline we came up with was a point system, where he earned or lost points for bad grades/good grades, discipline vs exceptional behavior, lies, etc. A point equalled a week wait on getting his drivers license. we kept track on a chart on the fridge. At one point, we were up to him not getting his license until december. As his birthday got closer, he really got worried he wouldn't be able to get his license on his bday, and we really started seeing a change. The points started coming off. He got his license on his birthday. Now we are trying to figure out what will motivate him as much as that did
What do I do about my stepson stealing my underwear?
Why's he swiping your underwear?I can think of a few reasons he might be doing it:To piss you off.You got nice underwear, and he wants them.His underwear are all dirty and he needs some clean ones.He feels closer to you by wearing your underwear.He's got a thing for you.As for what you can do about it, you need to find out why he's doing so. If he's just trying to get your goat, you guys need to work on whatever issues are between the two of you, with an eye towards generating more good, positive feelings towards each other. If he wants underwear like what you wear, buy him a bunch. If his end up dirty and he needs clean ones, make sure he knows how to do laundry, or just throw his in with yours if necessary. If it just makes him feel good, like secure or safe or comforted to wear your shorts, then I'd let him keep doing it, and figure out what else you can do to help the kid out. If he has a thing for you, it's going to depend on factors like his age and developmental stage, his sexual identity, etc. Be loving, kind and supportive, regardless. He'll most likely grow out if it. You need to define some boundaries, but do so gently. He'll need to know that you care very much for him, regardless of what issues he's going through.It ain't that big a deal to share your shorts with him, anyways. Yeah, it's odd, and it'd be irritating to have to hunt for your underwear all the time. But you guys have each other's cooties already anyways, and cooties mostly come out in the wash. And, assuming he gets some sort of emotional comfort out of it, that's really pretty sweet.
How do you stop a 9 year old boy from having angry outbursts?
It's an attention thing. If it is in regards to being a sore loser then you have to nip it in the butt. Since you are not the parents then you have to approach the parents and tell them the situation. Then ask permission if you can exclude them from a game if he acts out. If they say they understand then do it.Next time he acts out tell him he can't play anymore. Then start a new game with the other kids and leave him out. It'll tell him that his acting out is the exact opposite of what he wants....attention. He's being ignored while all the other children are getting attention. Tell him during that game that if he behaves himself then he can play the next game. Kids dont want to be left out and without going too hard, you're teaching him that his actions have consequences and there is an ability to redeem himself based on his next series of actions.
I have a 11 year old son who keeps getting in trouble at school how do i get him to stop acting out in school?
ur husband should talk to him, i was going to be funny n tell you to stop beating him til i read the rest of ur details, he's not ur kid (that is after all going onthe assumption that you n ur husband do not beat him or verbally/emotionally abuse him) what kind of home life does he have w. his mother or the ppl he is around when he is with her? not saying she is the bad guy in this, n skool perhaps there r others at skool that bring it out of him? im sure im not much help, my kids r not this old yet, ive not been thru it, i did have a very miserable angry childhood which has led to many problems in my adult life. perhaps it would take some counseling or therapy, just try to ensure he never feels like he is bad or doing something wrong, that can lead to more agressivness, i was doing good in therapy til my mom took me out n stole my shrink (im still bitter about that one!) good luck, i hope everything is works out,