How can I tell my Mom I want to move out with my boyfriend? She wants me to stay home and save.
Have you ever lived outside your parents house? Has he? Can you pay rent and live on your own and still save money? look at rental rates, aproximate utilities, figure out what your cost of living is (I figure on $50/week per person for food), figure out a budget and present it to your mom. At what point does your mom feel living on your own as an adult (living with mom isn't immature unless mom is supporting you), if that's what you want, is important enough to sacrifice some savings? Show your mom you can still save. Would she have a hard time making things meet without you? Does your boyfriend have an ulterior motive for you to move in? Can he pay his bills?I think maybe your mom is partly just afraid to let you grow. Afraid to see you ‘fail’, get hurt, heartbroken etc. but falling and getting back up is part of life.I wouldnt consider marriage at this time.*** important*** Woild you be moving into a place he already lives and is on the lease and you wouldn't be? If things don't work out, it would be easier to leave. If things don't work out, I'd hope your mom would let you back in. If you have a joint lease and he leaves, you would be responsible for paying his portion too, get a roommate etc.Some things to consider when moving in with anyone:housekeeping habits hygiene and potentially differing standardslifestyle - how often do you and he plan to have guests and for what reason? - movies/football games on tv? Partying? Drinking or getting high? Are you and he ok with each other's friends being around and crashing if they get too drunk to drive for example.bills and money - you're both financially responsible? Combine finances or split everything right down middle? alternate months on utility bills? Eventually a joint checking account to pay shared bills?Some me things to consider when moving in with your SO:sex often drops in frequency when living together.relationships often change. Do either of you anticipate change? How would household duties be split? cleaning and cooking and laundry shared? Seems it's common one does all the cooking and one does all the dishes and kitchen cleanup.Though in 2 years, I'd hope you've discussed what happens if you get pregnant, but since other answers have mentioned it… Make sure that's done.
How do I tell my parents that I am moving in with my boyfriend of 2 months? They don't like my boyfriend and I know that I have to tell them but when I actually think of telling them I feel that it’s better to not move in with my boyfriend at all.
Hi friend. I’m glad you want to tell your parents about this decision. I know it will be a difficult conversation to have, but I think in the long run it will be healthier for your relationship to let them know your plan. I would encourage you to be completely straightforward and honest with them. Let them know what you have decided and why. Be open to listening to them, and taking their advice into consideration. I imagine they want what’s best for you. If they have reason to be concerned about your boyfriend, take that seriously. The fact that you are considering not moving in with him when you think about telling your parents makes me wonder if subconsciously you share their concerns? Two months is not a lot of time to get to know someone, so seeking out the opinions of others is a good idea. I wish you the best, and hope your conversation is full of grace and care!
How should I tell my parents that I want to move in with my boyfriend without being married (I come from a religious family)?
I was in your position exactly, as a graduate student in my mid-20s. My husband (then my boyfriend) and I were attending graduate school together. I started out in a little apartment by myself, and he lived in a 2-bedroom apartment with one of his best buddies from their undergraduate years. Buddy got himself a girlfriend and decided to move in with her, leaving my boyfriend with a half-empty apartment and more rent than he wanted to pay just for himself. Rather than go through the process of finding him a stranger to live with, I decided to give up my apartment and move in with him.I anticipated a lot of backlash. My parents are pretty devout and disapproved of me even being alone in the same room with him. So, I marshalled my arguments. I thought about preparing PowerPoint slides, perhaps dressing in one of my power suits for the occasion, even though this was all going to be hashed out over the phone. Every little bit helps. In the end, it was a total non-issue. My parents acknowledged the wisdom of my arguments and commented that they’d raised me right and trusted me to conduct myself accordingly. I was shocked. And then I was relieved. I moved in with my boyfriend, we finished graduate school, and then we got married. All’s well that ends well. I had an aunt who was just scandalized, but she got over it.Remember that you are (I hope) an independent adult if you’re talking about moving in with someone. In the end, that’s all that matters. It’s your life, and they don’t get a vote.
My parents don't like my boyfriend :(?
My parents don't like my boyfriend :(? My boyfriend is 23 and I'm 20 and we've been dating for over two years. We don't live so far away, but sometimes we don't see each other often because he'll work six days of week. Because of this, he asked me the other day if I would consider moving in with him. My parents don't like him but last night they told me they hoped I don't consider marrying him ever and they really don't like the idea of me living with him. I'm a Marketing student, I commute to a good University and my boyfriend works as a garbage man, or "sanitation worker." I don't know, he says he doesn't care what people call him. He makes a decent living and has his own apartment. He doesn't come from my type of family background, I was strictly raised Catholic, he's an Atheist and says he doesn't want to get married in a church and that REALLY bugs my parents. My parents say "I can do better." I don't understand! It's not that he didn't want to go to college, he didn't come from a privileged family like mine so he didn't really have the money and his younger sister got really sick so he had to find work to help his mother pay for treatment and his father walked out of the family after she was born. He says that right now, he has no desire to go to college after seeing all the amount of debt his friends have buried themselves in. The job he has now gives him amazing benefits and he feels like he would be stupid to walk away from it. My parents think it's immature that he skateboards in his free time, but HE'S GOOD AT IT. He's very talented, he also plays guitar and is very mechanically inclined with cars. He also has a Motorcycle! I think everything about him is attractive and I could really care less about what he does for a living. But what he does for a living is important! Being a garbage man, he works at the crack of dawn, in all weather conditions, sometimes on Saturdays, lifts a ton of pounds a day, has a high risk of injury and keeps the world clean! I feel that guys in his job are heroes and deserve the same recognition as Firefighters and Police. I don't want my family to feel like I'm betraying them but my boyfriend but he has told me he wants to spend the rest of his life with me and I feel the same way:/
How to tell my parents I am moving in with my boyfriend?
Please read the whole thing! Best answer 10 points! I'm 18 and my boyfriend is 21. My parents are somewhat controlling. I have a strict curfew and I am not allowed to spend the night with my boyfriend. I have tried sitting them down and explaining to them that I want to spend the night with him because I love him and enjoy his company, and that it's not about sex. They just said it would be disrespectful of me to stay the night with a boy while I live with them. I have a strict curfew, and I am the only one out of my friends that does. My parents think I can't do anything on my own (laundry, dishes, pay bills, etc). I am their first child which probably contributes to that. I have been caught spending the night with my boyfriend twice and was grounded for my last week of high school. Since I took dual enrollment for school, I am done with school now, but I don't officially graduate until June 1. I am planning to move out around early July. They say I don't pay for anything myself, so I took the initiative to get on my own phone plan. The only other thing they pay for is car insurance. My car that they gave me for my 16th birthday, however, is in their name. So I was thinking about asking them to put it in my name as a graduation present, but I don't know if that would be obvious I was planning on moving out. My boyfriend and I have already calculated the monthly expenses and he makes our schedule at work, so we are almost guaranteed the hours we need. I already have a budget planned out, and I plan on waiting until I have at least 1500 in savings, and keep working full time of course. I am not angry with them, or doing it to rebel. I have always been very mature for my age and think I am ready to take on these responsibilities.
How to tell your parents you're moving out with your boyfriend?
Hey everyone! So I have a bit of a dilema. I'm planning to move out of my parents house hopefully by Feburary (so I can save up a little bit more) and I have yet to tell my parents. To add to it, I plan on finding an apartment with my boyfriend so we can both live there. I'm 20 years old, my boyfriend is 21, we both have steady full time jobs that pay more than minimum wage and we both go to school. My boyfriend stays with me and my family 5 days out of the week already so we already practically live together and we love it! With the money we earn collectively my boyfriend and I could easily afford a 1 bedroom apartment, including all the other bills we would have to pay and groceries. We found an apartment that is PERFECT for us and it's in a nice area close to the beach. Utilites are all included!! (We got really lucky with this one!) So everything is in place and were all set for Feburary. I'm just really really REALLY scared to tell my parents because my mom has already made her feelings clear that she would like me to live at home until i finish school. She said that she's afraid that if I move out I will stop going to school because then my rent money will be more important then going to class. I guess when she first move out she went to school for a a couple of months but then had to stop because she had to work more to pay for her bills. I totally understand my mom's concern especially because of her first hand experience but when she moved out she had my older sister that she had to pay for and take care of as well, and I don't. My dad is going to hate me moving out regardless because I'm his little girl and I am moving out with a boy (NOOO!!!) I know my boyfriend and I are young and this is a big step for us but we both feel more then ready, financially and emotionally. We've been together for 2 years and have known eachother for 6 years. What should I say? Should I tell them now or wait untill it gets closer to Febuary?
How to tell my parents I'm moving in with my boyfriend?
My boyfriend and I have been together for over 5 years and have decided we would like to move in together. We're both excited and looking forward to starting a new chapter in our relationship. We've also started talking more seriously about getting engaged and planning a wedding in the next few years which is also very exciting for us. However, I'm all but certain my parents won't be quite so happy about this. I have a close relationship with both of them and love them both very much but we don't see "eye to eye" on certain issues. One of those issues happens to be co-habitation, which has made my decision a bit more difficult. My parents are both very religious and believe co-habitation before marriage is wrong, I respect their view but don't feel the same way. I have not told my parents about our decision yet and have been struggling to find the right words. I want to tell them in a respectful way but also assert that this is my decision. Even if they are upset about this I want to still have a relationship with them, so cutting off ties or telling them off isn't what I'm going for. I'm expecting that they'll have some harsh words for my boyfriend and I and will likely become angry about the news. I don't want to escalate the situation by being too confrontational but also don't want them to think the decision is up to them. I understand and appreciate having respect for my parents but also know the importance of setting boundaries and making my own choices in life. Another complicating factor, also because of religious differences, is that my parent's aren't especially fond of my boyfriend. I know this situation will probably stir up some negative feelings between them but I would like them to still have the possibility of a closer relationship in the future. I've tried going over ways to tell them but just can't seem to find the right words or even the courage to plan out when to do it. If anyone has some words of wisdom or examples of ways I can make this uncomfortable situation a little easier I'd greatly appreciate it. Also,as a side note, I do understand that this issue is sensitive for some religious beliefs and I respect all views. I don't intend for this to be offensive to you personally, so please show me the same respect. If you don't agree, just say so kindly. Thank you.
How do I tell my parents I want to move out of state? My boyfriend lives in Chicago and I am looking for a job in order to relocate there. I am 30 and an independent adult, but they think I’m crazy to leave a good job.
Just do what you need to do and let them know your plans. Your problem is that you emotionally crave their approval. Being loving to them is enough. You don’t owe them veto rights over your adult decisions.They may have some wisdom to share with you. You might regret moving for your boyfriend. You may regret leaving a good job. Make no mistake about that. Women have been giving up careers with no solid promise of a future just to be with men for time on end. So, they might be right.But, it’s your choice. My recommendation is to not quit your job or move. Rather, determine that any new job will be better than the one you have now, a true step up and one with better career potential long term. Only move once you get and accept a job like that.You also may consider getting your own apartment rather than living with your boyfriend. If you don’t want to live in Chicago by yourself or can’t afford a decent apartment in a safe area, then don’t move. There is no guarantee that you’ll stay with your boyfriend. If you can’t be happy there without him, don’t move.If you move, develop your own life rather than centering your life around your boyfriend. Make separate friends. Have separate activities. Don’t account to him for all your time. Make it a career move and a lifestyle adventure. Date him but don’t spend all your time with him.I strongly feel that for most women, this will yield better results than taking any job to be able to move and moving in with the guy, starting a life centered around him. He’s less likely to take you for granted and more likely to work hard to develop a strong relationship with you. Never put yourself in the position to be taken for granted.If you do all these things, your parents are more likely to be supportive of you as well. That’s not why I’m suggesting this approach, but I suspect it will have that effect if they understand that this is the approach you are taking.Best,Andrea