Why do I feel bad about my life when looking at other people’s Instagram accounts, and what should I do about it?
Trust me, pal, life would be much better and easy if we know how to and when to demarcate between reality and virtual reality.You are not alone.Almost every other person on social media feels mentally down for one reason or the other, seeing the highlight reels of others on social media platforms like Instagram, Facebook or Snapchat.I am no different.But having a career in digital media AND growing to know this social media world better, I have understood that it is foolish on anyone’s part to buy everything that social media sells to us, at face value.A simple way of putting this would be, you have a bad, bad day, wherein, say, you had a fight with your parents, your cat died, or you just simply don’t even feel like waking up from bed and do nothing but laze around the whole day.Now, would you put this negative/mundane angle of your life on social media?Chances are marginal, for you may feel the onus of the possibility of being judged, being called an attention-seeker, moody, et cetera.Now compare this to a day where you just feel good about yourself. Say, you got a damn nice dress, which fetched you a plethora of compliments, a bevy of people viewed your Snapchat stories, etc. And you do feel like basking in this glory for a change, and you click a picture and post it on Instagram/Facebook.These are all highlight reels that you are sharing.There are people (though less) who share as much of their sad stories as they do for their happy ones, and then there are people who only let their positive side show on social media, concealing the chink in their armor fairly well, simply for the reason that they do not want the world to see their inner demons.But amid all this: truth remains just one. Everyone has their dark days and perfection is just a myth. Nobody’s life is as perfect as their Instagram Feed or Snapchat history might look, and this is a fact.You may feel like, ‘’Oh, she’s got a perfect life!’’ ‘’He has nothing to worry about! I wish I had a life like that!’’ but bottom line is, those persons aren’t living a life that’s hunky dory either, just like you. Just that their problems might be different than yours.It’s the best to thus treat highlight reels as they are: ‘’Reels’’ and know that ‘’Real’’ is quite different. It is basic, it lacks background music, and sometimes, it sucks! But hey, that’s life. We make, we break, and we gotta live it the way we want, whatever it takes! :)Good luck!
I love a girl who is currently dating someone else, but I feel she might love me. I don't know how to talk to her about this clearly. Is it wrong to tell her to leave her boyfriend?
You're too nice. I'm sure that this answer is going to be in my top What is the worst dating advice? Ever. You love her. She loves you. She's going to stay with the guy she doesn't love. So she's either lying to you about love, or lying about the guy.I had this situation a couple of times and whilst it wasn't love (I had a romantic idea that I'd only tell one girl I loved her in my life - been married for 10 years now) there was something there. It didn't happen. I was useful as a fall back option, a reserve date, as pressure on the boyfriend but I was never in the running. So you have a couple of choices. You either raise your game or stop playing. When you raise your game you can either do it the moral or immoral way. Morally these are the things you do:Get your body in shapeGive your clothes a make overThink about what she likes (not what you think she should like) and reflect thatImmorally Control your Facebook feed so that she only ever sees you with girls prettier than her. And she must see themFind a 'beard' who will pretend to be your girlfriend. Very pretty and articulate. Going out with someone better than you raises your value. Identify and create 'stories' that will make her attracted to you and make sure she hears them via third parties. (Your work with orphans, the local children's hospital and small furry animals)Find the matchmaker her parents use (if old fashioned) and bribe her to include your nameThe present boy friend may or may not last. Macho telling her to leave him will not work. You put yourself in the same class as men who attack women on buses if you do that. The best you will get is scorn and a slap. You make yourself look so good that when it ends you are the best choice. Not because you believe it (which is what you do being a naive optimist - a general reflection on people rather than you specifically ;)) but because she believes it. This almost certainly won't work but you will then be set up to get a really great girl to spend the rest of your life with. So you have a win win solution. Either you get her or you get someone better than her
Why do people say feels instead of feelings?
People say 'feels' instead because it's part of a meme. Nowadays, the internet community focuses on using memes for humor in daily context (Facebook, Twitter, etc.) For example, the latest meme going around is "Do you even lift?". Try going to KnowYourMeme.com and type 'feels' in the search bar. :) P.S. Another one that's all over is "I know that feel, bro/sis."
Is it abnormal for me to not feel anything in particular about my birthday?
Hey, we may be a minority but we are definitely not abnormal.Personally, I am not excited about my birthday or anybody's for that matter.That enthusiasm existed up to 12 years old when I used to announce my birthdate and plans a month ago deciding who will come for my birthday party and using it as a tactic on my friends to be nice to me.Now whenever anybody calls me for their birthday party or treat, I want to run away. I, to a certain extent, think birthdays are stupid.Celebrating birthdays seem to me like "Hey, because I was born on this day, some odd years ago, I will be the center of attraction for today and everybody be extra nice to me".Firstly, being partly introvert, I dislike being the center of attraction. Everyone wishing and asking what are my plans. Please shoosh!Secondly, I am not a phone-call person. Texts work best with me. All these friends and relatives calling as soon as the clock strikes 12 makes me anxious. And relatives I have not spoken to all year suddenly asking me whether I have given up old ways now that I am one year older is partly annoying.Thirdly, I am forgetful by nature. I have trouble remembering dates. Forgetting birthdays is one thing, hearing "how can you forget my birthday" for a very long time is another. Also, being the indecisive person I am, I just can't decide on gifts. Oh boy! I feel miserable when somebody calls me for their party or treat. I end up giving my gifts months later. I gifted my bestfriend in December when her birthday happens to be in June.Lastly, let's all agree that birthdays make you awkward. When everybody surrounds you and sings "Happy Birthday" what are you supposed to do there standing with that knife. It feels like forever standing there with that awkward smile.So, yes, not celebrating birthdays does not make you boring. It is a choice. I will never really understand the hype around birthdays. If for anything, I will only be excited about gifts, whether at 9 or 90. So yes, gifts are welcome.
I'm not looking forward to my birthday?
I'm turning 21 on Saturday. I'm going to be going out clubbing with some friends in the evening/night and probably stay at home during the day by myself, but with my mum for a couple of hours. Usually I look forward to my birthday, but the past few years have been such disappointments, my friends have used me even on the one day they should show that they care. Last year they sent me to the shop to get a big bottle of vodka for everyone, they never paid me back. The people who I have invited out this year are only a few people, incluing the friends from last year. I don't really talk to them that often. I don't really have a CLOSE friend with, not one, that I share my problems with and at least get the impression I give a damn. If I had close friends like that I would look forward to it more, but I KNOW my friends don't really like me, and every year I am reminded of that. I feel like such a loser :/ Also my family is worrying too much about my bday, I know my mum has spent a lot and I feel guilty, I don't deserve it.
I feel so bad I yelled at my daughter on her bday :(?
Today was my daughter's 3rd birthday. She's been in the process of being potty trained but with all the excitement of her party and toys and her bday, she peed her pants about 5-6 times today because she was so busy and stimulated. Now I know as a rational person, I should understand. I mean, it's her bday she was so excited and didn't want to go on the potty. So I cleaned up the messes like nothing until it started getting late. I asked her specifically if she had to pee and she said no (angrily too) so I let it go and a few minutes later, she had peed for the 6th time on the carpet in the same spot as twice before and I just got so mad and yelled at her which I know is so wrong. I feel bad because she cried hysterically. I tried to tell her I was sorry but she got an big attitude and told me she wanted me to leave her room after I read a few books to go to sleep. I know I should have let it slide bc it's her bday but I was getting so sick of cleaning up pee messes. I feel like I really overreacted and I am so sorry I made her cry. Should I have just let it go? I
What will you do if nobody wishes you on your birthday?
Here is the list of things I can do :Cry myself to sleep.Rung each and every one up and confront them how dare they didn't remember my birthday.Look for answers as to why don't people wish me on my birthday. “ Am I such a horrible person” “ What do I need to change in myself so that people remember my birthday” “ or they remember my birthday just don't feel like making time to wish me”Here is the list of things that I will do :Idgaf , if nobody wishes me on my birthday. Nobody is under any obligation to remember my “ big day”I will go around my usual business. Go to school, teach kids, come back home and sleep peacefully.Eat special dinner at night prepared by my mother consisting of all my favourite things .Tbh, it's been 3–4 years since people stopped wishing me ( except my parents and few friends). Last year even my parents and my boyfriend forgot my birthday. Earlier it used to hurt me a lot that people forget my birthday even though I wish them on their. I used to feel bad , cry like a kid and what not. You won't believe two of my blog posts are about this only :P But eventually I realised,I am the one responsible for it, I had shut myself from the outer world how will they remember it. I am not in contact, rarely online , never text or call them up.I don't have real friends, just online friends. And that kinda friendship requires efforts from both the sides to work.Nobody actually remembers anyone's birthday except the special someone's. They just get notified through social media or something.Nobody is unemployed enough to remember petty things like birthdays. They all have got important things to do.Birthdays are not “big days” so stop worrying and whining about people not remembering it ( note to myself)Those who will care enough will remember and find ways to make it special for you, no matter what :)P.S. If nobody wishes you on your birthday, you can tell me yours and be assured that I Will wish you every year !!Thanks for A2A
Should my wife be going on vacation without me?
she won a trip for a caribean cruise i told her she could go im not her boss but i know i would of never went without her i cant go she knows that shes taking a girlfriend weve only been together 4 years and i just feel in her heart she wouldnt wanna go on vacation without me and i will admit my head is all over the place on this i do plan on taking a vacation without her to let her know how i feel