How to deal with my husband who buys expensive things without talking to me first?
HE IS PROBABLY A SHOPPING ADDICT! Read oN: Many people love to shop, perhaps women slightly more than men, but you need to be careful because excessive shopping can lead to financial disaster. So how do you know when your addiction has gone too far? How do you pay down the bills after you've shopped till you drop? CNBC's Sharon Epperson, author of the book “The Big Payoff,” has tips on how to kick the habit. Are you a binge buyer? Does retail therapy make you feel better after a bad day? How often do you hit the mall or shop online? How much are you willing to spend to make yourself feel better? Shopping without ever thinking about the costs is a big problem. It may even be an addiction. A study by the American Journal of Psychiatry found one out of 12 people (nearly as many men as women) are compulsive shoppers — and their shopping habits often damage their work, relationships and finances. If you’re juggling credit card bills and pouring money into finance charges just to be able to shop a little more, your spending has probably spun out of control. You may not even realize how much credit card debt you’ve accumulated, or how many other bills went unpaid as you added another pair of shoes to your shelf. Did you think about how much you could have socked away in your retirement nest egg, or for your kid’s college education, or put into emergency reserves, if you’d saved just a little of that money you spent? You need to stop financing your future. To do that, you have to change the way you shop. 1. Know what you have Look in your closet or around the house before you shop. If you have enough shoes, dresses, kids’ clothes or electronics to last you for the next year — or at least for this season — stop! You don’t need to buy another couple of outfits from Gymboree for the kids, a new gold chain or purse.
What is an average amount to pay for a wedding ring if the guy?
That really depends. How much debt is he carrying? How picky is the lady about her ring? Its source? What sort of savings does he have? Does he plan to personally contribute funds to the wedding itself? It's really between the guy and his bank account. Talk to your lady about what sort of ring she'd like. Price it out. If you can't afford it, look into alternate resources for similar but less pricy styles. You can find some amazing deals on eBay, in pawn shops, and at estate sales. Don't be afraid to get creative. My guy didn't pay a dime on my wedding ring. It wasn't because he wasn't willing or able to, either. It was my choice. My mother died not too long before we got engaged, and I inherited her wedding ring. I asked to use hers as my wedding ring. He figured, as I did, that the ring worn in a happy marriage that lasted more than thirty years couldn't be a bad sign and agreed. The important thing to remember is that while the ring is symbolic of your love, it isn't your love or your marriage. Choose something you can afford that makes her content. If you can afford to give her precisely what she wants, that's fantastic! Do it, and more power to you both! If not, give her what you reasonably can and tell her she'll have the option to upgrade when you can afford it. But as I said in the beginning, how much you spend shouldn't be determined by averages, but by your personal financial situation.
My girlfriend thinks her house is haunted..tell me what you think please..what should she do.?
She hears unnatural things at night, like a small girl crying. Also, during the night, i don't know if her cats just weird or not, but it will stand by the wall and just stand there staring at it for a long time, like something was there. Her emotions, are all out of whack, one minute shes fine, the next shes easily angered, and she never cry's, that i know of, but now, for some reason its really easy for her to, over small things.. And to add onto it she usually feels a pressure on her chest... Her room, or what ever room shes in to her, its very hot, even though the air is on..... So what do you guys think? What should she do?.
My previous partner bought me iPhone 6s. We broke up and now he wants to get the phone back otherwise the police will be called. what should I do?
A lot of people seem to be suggesting destroying the phone and then giving it back to him. I strongly discourage that. You would be a) acknowledging that he owns it and has a right to it and b) then destroying what you’ve now admitted is his property.I was in a similar situation awhile back. I bought my girlfriend an iPhone and we split the cost of an iPad. When we broke up, I recognized that the iPhone was a gift. I asked her to pay for my half of the iPad (she never did).Bottom line is, unless he can prove that the phone was not a gift and that he was only letting you use it, he’s got a tough road ahead. The police are going to laugh at him. This isn’t criminal; you didn’t steal his property. At best, this is a civil matter and he could take you to small claims court. So he’s either ignorant or bluffing.If he’s bluffing, call his bluff. The police won’t do anything and might tell him to file a claim with small claims court. If that happens, wait for the summons, go to court, and argue that he gave it to you as a gift. You have a pretty good chance of winning that unless he has some kind of evidence that it wasn’t a gift.If he’s ignorant, ignore him. He’ll call the police and they’ll laugh and tell him to work it out.Either way, don’t destroy the phone and don’t give it back to him. He’s going to be hard pressed to prove it wasn’t a gift. Keep the phone and wait for him to actually do something tangible.If you don’t want to wait around, sell the phone and use the money to buy your own phone. He can still take you to court, but you can say you thought it was a gift and you wanted to upgrade.
How could 1950s families afford to have only a working father, but a stay-at-home mother?
By living cheaply and having different expectations from life.It was common for such families to own only one car, saving on insurance, gas, and maintenance. It was common to park that car on a carport or open drive, not in a garage. There was no central air conditioning, pool pump, Internet, or cable bill to pay. The newspaper was cheap—subsidized by advertising—and TV was free, if you owned a set—which most families didn’t until the late 1960s. With a full-time mom at home, there were no day care costs, no dishwasher, and often no clothes dryer, even in homes that had a washer.There was no eating out. That was something the adults might do once or twice a year. It was a big deal. Even when I was a kid, we only ate out rarely, usually after a family outing, perhaps a dozen times a year. When I was in kindergarten, the big McDonald’s promotional slogan—aimed at stay-at-home moms—was “You deserve a break today.” It was apt and effective. It wasn’t until the disco era that people started viewing fast food as a normal part of their diet, or restaurants as a normal source of prepared meals.If you could grow a garden you did, and the one truly indispensable household appliance was a deep freeze—which made it possible to save leftovers, excess garden produce, and venison for future use. You clipped coupons. You entered contests. You dreamed—if you were my mom—of the life you might have as a carefree writer if only…but that wasn’t real life. If you were a woman, you did the ironing and the cleaning and the caring. If you were a serviceman’s wife, you did the repairs too—whether or not you really knew how.Oh, and if you got really sick, you just died, and that was an accepted part of life.This was not inherently better or worse than how we live today. It was simpler, but it was often highly inequitable.EDIT: I did not, in my answer, mean to imply that the answer was poverty, only that the middle class—in general—was satisfied with a life that was in many ways, far less materially ambitious. Obviously the middle class has always included a range of incomes. My father was career military and my mother was a teacher who quit for almost 20 years to raise a family. That should have put them square in the lower middle of the middle class of the time.
Roommate problems...am I blowing this outta proportion?
I had a similar roommate problem. I paid for EVERYTHING that we used in our kitchen- all the pots, pans, cutlery, mixing bowls, blenders, etc. My roommate would only half-wash them, not rinse them and then leave them to dry without ever putting them away. I repeatedly asked her to wash the dishes properly, and her actual response was, "This is the way my grandma does it." One day I just moved EVERYTHING that I had paid for out of the kitchen. She threw a hissy-fit and told me I had no right to take the stuff away because she needed it to eat. I told her tough luck and that if she wasn't going to take care of my stuff I would no longer make it available for everyone's use. The other roomies got pissed off at her for causing me to take away all my stuff. A few weeks later this girl spilled red wine all over the floor and didn't clean it up. I asked her to clean it up and she told me that if it bothered me, I should clean it up myself. I responded by taking one of my wine glasses from the kitchen and dropping it on her bedroom floor, causing glass to shatter all over the place. I then told her that if the glass bothered her, she should clean it up herself. She moved out at the end of the month and the apartment was clean from that day forward! So I suggest a three-pronged plan of attack: 1. Talk to your roommates about what bothers you. Try to make a plan. If that fails... 2. Make their lives difficult. In your case, I would suggest that you buy toilet paper but keep it in your room and bring it into the bathroom only when you use the toilet. It's a pain, but it's worth it when they realize nobody has bought any toilet paper! Also, cook a big dinner for your friends using ALL of their food (so that you have a good excuse to use it all up). They'll understand how it feels to think you have food in the fridge, open the door and realize it's all gone. If this fails... 3. Get violent / aggressive / rude and wait for them to leave!
My boyfriend wants me to buy a car in my name since I have better credit & he will use the car & pay me monthly. What are the cons to this?
What are the PROs to this? If you want to make a joint commitment to each other, pool your resources and share responsibilities, it’s called MARRIAGE. You know this guy better than I do, but we both know he has lousy credit. How come he does and you don’t? Obviously we are looking at two different senses of responsibility. Can YOU make the payments on the months when he “forgets” to give you the money? For how long? And if you’re paying for a car, wouldn’t you like to drive it? Or at least know exactly where it is when you’re not?He wants you to commit your credit to a loan, buy a car and hand him the keys. He will then use or abuse the car as he sees fit. There are people in prison as you read this that are there simply because they let someone use their car. That friend went out and committed a felony. In many states you do not have to be present at a crime to be convicted of aiding and abetting or as an accessory to a crime. This means you get the same punishment. Your friend kills someone, you may be looking at life. IT HAS HAPPENED. IF IT’S IN YOUR NAME IT’S YOUR CAR!Less severe example: your boyfriend uses your car to go score or worse, sell, some drugs. He gets caught. Ever hear of civil asset forfeiture? Your car was used in a criminal act. It’s not your car anymore! It’s next stop is the police auction. You have no rights. The police do not have to prove you knew about the crime; they don’t even have to charge you. YOU have to PROVE you knew nothing. It’s hard to do when the car is in your name.Lastly,and this is a big deal, this deal puts you in an unfavorable position relationship-wise. Let’s suppose the relationship sours, or worse, becomes abusive. You’d like to end it but now you have to get the car back. He sure as hell won’t be paying for it. With luck you can get the car without having to go to court, and he won’t trash the car out of spite. Or will you avoid conflict and stay in a bad relationship because the complications deter you from doing what you know you should?Not just no. HELL NO.