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Is This Denial Advice

Can I get a US visa again after a denial?

In my experience, many applicants trying to overcome a recent refusal walk away - refused a second time - feeling that they didn’t get a “fair chance” to convince the officer to issue the visa.Reinterviews are often shorter, because the officer already has so much information in your file, including most of what you had to say about your case the first time. Many consuls, when examining someone recently denied, tend to assume that the applicant is in fact ineligible. That is to say, they assume the first decision was correct. Some consuls are so abrupt as to begin the re-interview with the simple question: “what’s changed since we saw you last?” In other words, only some new circumstance, such as a promotion or a marriage, might lead us to a different outcome the second time, because the first outcome was correct given the facts then known.If I examine you for a re-interview and decide you are eligible, am I not saying that my colleague who recently denied you was wrong? We hesitate to do that, if only because we are so sure of the correctness of our decisions that we hate it when a colleague overrules us.My advice is to begin a re-interview with some very brief prepared remarks about why you believe you are eligible. For first interviews, an applicant should let the Consul lead the questioning and give answers to the Consul’s questions. But for a second interview, if you don’t speak up early you won’t get the chance later. If you are passive, you let the Consul settle on the conclusion that you were ineligible the first time, and that you remain ineligible. By the time you get to say your piece it’s too late.Now all of this ignores the matter of whether or not you are, in fact, eligible. If you’re not, re-applications are a waste of your time and money.

I'm going through the denial phase of a break up. Any advice on how to cope?

I'm sorry you're going through this. You seem familiar with the phases of grief, so you already know this is a process you just have to go through. I think having awareness of where you are and what's to come, as well as knowing that what you're going through is completely normal can only be helpful. My best advice is to be kind and patient with yourself. In order to move through the the phases of grief as quickly as possible, let yourself feel all the crappy feelings to come. Go ahead and let yourself wallow in misery for a couple of weeks. Let yourself do whatever feels good- within some degree of reason, of course- to get through the hard days early on. By letting yourself really feel everything, you will get through it and over it now instead of repressing stuff to deal with years later (take it from someone who knows on this one). Plus, you'll get tired of being miserable pretty soon and you'll be ready to move on.As a sidenote, sometimes denial can be somewhat helpful to get through the workday without falling apart if you're not able to take time off. Just make sure you build in as much time as you need to be a sad bastard whenever possible. And letting yourself be sad is what is ultimately going to push you out of denial.

What are some ways to stop being in denial?

Denial is a defense mechanism that protects the ego from acknowledging something it believes too psychologically painful to "own."  The fact that you have acknowledged you've been negatively affected by the assault indicates that you're not "in denial" per se.  I'd recommend talking to a counselor or clergy person to identify in what ways (i.e. how you can tell) you've been affected, process the feelings related to the assault and any changes to self that have occurred since; and ways you can limit the negative effects and work to restore "you" to your level of functioning prior to the incident.

What will you do If your friend is in denial but she needs your advice?

I would ask her if she wants or needs to talk. I would let her know that I support her. I would tell her that she can come to me and depend on me, if she has questions that she needs answers to, but I wouldn't impose myself on her. She would need to ask for help or advice from me. If she did… I would be there for her and answer any questions that she needed answers for, and try to give her advice and or “options” that could help her to make decisions for herself.She must act on her own decisions and Choices for her own life. If I care about her… I make the choice to help her find a solution to her denial and confusion. That's the type of person that I am…if someone needs my help…I will help them, with the best of my ability that I have. The final choice that they make…is theirs to make.And usually, when I do that for someone…they are NO longer in denial.

I was denied a B1/B2 visa twice on immigration section 214(b). What does this mean?

Visa officers are very smart, they are psychologists, they have close to 2 minutes to judge you based on few sets of questions.My first experience was that I was quite nervous at the time of interview, and could not present myself well, and counselor officer refused visa under section 214 B. But after a month, with lot of preparation and few tricks my visa got approved. But everyone has their unique case, so you carefully see what could be the reasons for denial. Section 214 B, basically means,You are not able to demonstrate your intention of your visit (purpose should be clear).Or you are not able to demonstrate strong ties to your home country (they want strong ties which will forced you to come back after the visit).Or Your financials (your salary & investments) should be good enough. (in case you are lost due to some reasons you should be able to bear expenses on your own)But do not get depressed, 214 B denial is not permanent, apply again. Earlier I was going for a six week trip and I was not able to justify, why I need six weeks, so later I changed my duration from six weeks to three weeks. Be prepare well, present the answers with confidence and that’s it. In my case, just to add strong ties, I purposefully added few things in my answers, I believe that worked out for me. E.g., VO as asked me, exact three weeks, I said yes, I cannot stay more than that as my daughter is turning three on 31st. August, and I have to come back before that. So you can choose to prepare and plan your answers. If you need more explanation, share your case or feel free to get in touch. Thanks.

Is HOCD real or is it denial?

Seeing as you answered me i figured id help you on this 1...yes it is definently real you and i both have it and so do others. We are both going through the exact same thing and we are doing exactly what we shouldnt be (getting reasurance) these people dont know us, i dont know you, but i know exactly what is going on. The diffenrence is your way younger. I didnt even go through legit puberty til i was 15 but i had girls on the mind before that...we are not gay.We can reasure others because we know it exists but we cant reasure ourselves because we have ocd and our brains cant process it. If we fear being gay were not gay because we will never act out on our fears (i even had pocd and i asure that scared me far more then this* DO NOT SEARCH IT UP last thing you need is more ocd forms). Gay dreams dont define us. We do not turn gay over night.
These articles helped me even though you may have sent me 1
http://www.psychforums.com/obsessive-compulsive/topic48932.html
http://www.ocfoundation.org/EO_HO.aspx
http://ocdfree.tumblr.com/tagged/hocd
http://www.psychforums.com/obsessive-compulsive/topic79246.html
So we know we have it even if it feels like we just wana give up and give in. How about you go a week w/o reasuring yourself? Try being as active as possible and no checking for arousal.

My stepson is scared of me! Advice?

You will just have to prove to him through time that you will never abuse him physically or emotionally. You could probably tell him time after time till your blue in the face that you would never hit him, but on the other hand when you do become angry (which we all do), the memories from the past will prevail until there is a good history between you two. But, you do have every right to get in his face when he is being totally disrespectful. My mom would have slapped the teeth right out of my mouth had I said that to her....lol. (talking about child abuse...ha)

How can I say this with out sounding crude. You have to rule as you see it, can't allow past abuse to stepson control your level of control. Don't back down due to behavior that is not your doings, unfortunately it would be hard, but as time goes on he will soon move past his past with good parenting practices from you. You must let him know what will and will not fly with you, saving you many angry times in the future.

Even if it was free advice for which Michael Cohen can claim is pro-bono work, as soon as Hannity denied being a client, is the attorney-client privilege automatically negated, or does the privilege remain despite Hannity's denial?

The attorney client relationship is for the benefit of the client and not the attorney. Thus a client is allowed to waive the privilege. Moreover, if the client discloses privileged communications then the privileged is waived, permanently, whether the client intended to do so or not is irrelevant. Given these principles, , assuming an attorney client relationship existed in the first place, the denial of that relationship can be construed as a client waiver and thus the attorney cannot assert the privilege on behalf of the assumed client. In California, according to a controlling court decision, even a casual conversation in a social setting, in which no funds were paid to the lawyer, can create an attorney client relationship if, in the course of the conversation the attorney offers an opinion on a legal issue presented by the other party. Note, however,that the presence during a conversation of a non-client acts to forestall the creation of a privileged conversation. For example if a person goes to his attorney and brings along “Joe” his buddy from the gold club, that forestalls the privilege from being created.

Calling 311 to fumigate my apt for bedbugs in NYC, any advice?

Fumigating is ineffective against bedbugs. The three options are freezing them (with liquid nitrogen or another gas), getting rid of them with heat, or repeated chemical sprayings six weeks apart. Since you are expecting a baby, heat is the best option. A crew comes in, seals your doors and windows, and heats your apartment to above 120 degrees for a period of time. It's supposed to be very effective since bedbugs don't tolerate heat.

The thing is, your landlord is responsible for paying for extermination. You need to work with him or her. Try to avoid the chemical option. The only effective chemicals leave a residue for several weeks that will get into your body and your baby's. In addition, you will have to wash ALL of your clothes, towels, and bedding in hot water and keep them wrapped in plastic bags outside of the affected rooms for at least 6 weeks (the time it takes for the eggs to hatch).

If your landlord refuses to pay up for the heat option, speak with the exterminator about the chemicals. See if you can get something in writing about the safety of the chemicals. If he refuses, that's a red flag. Fight for the heat option.

Before you do any of this, confirm it's bed bugs. Flick the lights on at 5 in the morning and check your sheets, walls, etc for the little buggers. They look like apple seeds and leave black specks. Look online for pointers. One key thing to look for on yourself is three or more bites in a line. That's how they feed. A single bite could very well be a spider or other bug.

What to do when my fiancee is in denial about premature ejaculation?

Calmly tell him just what you said here...how much you love him and that he needs help with this issue. Sure it embarrasses him but given the choice to seek help and deal with this issue or lose you ...if he loves you he will at least talk about it ....