Is it rape if you have sex with your girlfriend when she is passed out?
My girlfriend was passed out almost and she was naked in my bed so I had sex with her. We have sex all the time so I thought it was no big deal. I knew she was on birth control... The next morning she woke up went to the bathroom and we started eating. She said she must have forgot we had sex or something I don't know if girls can tell I they had aex the night before or what but she knew... I told her she was pretty much passed out and that made her angry... She was like "that's basically rape". And I invited her over to my house after drinks of course sex is going to be involved. Do you guys think I did something wrong. She didn't break up with me she I just mad!
If your wife or girlfriend hits you during an argument for the first time, should you break up with her immediately and never go back to her?
Interesting question. It raises so many issues over domestic violence.I am totally against violence in a relationship and my first reaction was Yes, leave immediately. But then I had second thoughts. So here are some questions which I suggest asking first.Did you ever during the argument feel unsafe, scared or bullied by her actions?Are you scared to do / say things which you want to because of her temper?Were you injured by her hitting you? (As opposed to being just hurt by it. A slap across the face may smart a bit but causes no lasting effect. )Do you think that there is any possibility of you ever losing your temper and hitting her back if she ever did it again?Has she done this several times before?Do you want to leave her?If you can answer yes to any of these questions then I would say Yes, leave her, but if you can honestly answer them all No, then I would say stick with it.There is absolutely no place for domestic violence. But I remember the couple of times when I have been hit/slapped by a woman I was in a relationship with. This bit may be controversial to some, but I never, ever considered myself to be in a violent relationship, I never, ever considered the other person to be violent and although both of those relationships ultimately ended, violence was never even the slightest factor.Only you know what is right for you but please don’t assume that one hit constitutes an impossible violent personality.
Why does my husband beat me when he is angry?
Asking why he beats you implies that if you only knew what you had done wrong, you could change it and then he wouldn't beat you any more. This is a false assumption. It has nothing to do with you and everything to do with him. From my very brief experience in an abusive relationship, I can tell you that he doesn't even have to be angry to hit you.One time we were laying on his bed relaxing. I thought everything was okay, when all of a sudden WHAM! he hauled off and smacked me across my face. My glasses flew off my face, bending the frame.“What did you do that for?”“I felt like it.”My hunch is that this is only going to get worse. I hope that you don't live in a place where women have no rights, such as Saudi Arabia because you, IMHO, need to get out of this situation. You need to find a safe place where he cannot find you and drag you home.Your children need to be removed from this environment as well. Children learn what they see. Do you want your sons to learn that an acceptable way to handle their anger is to beat their wives? Do you want your daughters to learn that it is okay for men, or anyone for that matter, to hit them?You cannot do anything to change him or to fix him. If you leave, he COULD realize what he has done and get some help learning less violent and calmer ways to manage his anger. Or he might not. You have no control over him, his actions, or his decisions.You can only control yourself and whether you decide to stay in this marriage. As I said before, I hope that leaving him and making a life for yourself and your children, if any, is a viable option for you
Is hair pulling abuse (it was during an argument when he refused to take me home)? Does that mean he will soon start hitting me?
A2A Hair-pulling is abuse. There are some guys who will pull hair during sex and I guess some women like it but I don't. What happened to you had nothing to do with sex, it was violent. What happened when you had your hair pulled was abusive and meant as a way to control you and he's crossed a line and since he got away with pulling your hair he has found out he can use that to control you. Now anything can happen. You must end this relationship before you get hurt to the degree that he is capable of and he's just now starting to let you know what he's capable of. Fear is a powerful tool and he's already controlling you. You are changing your behavior to accommodate the fear and if you don't change he will hurt you worse so no matter what you do it's going to be wrong and the reason is it's not your fault, it's his choice. When he decided not to take you home that was him letting you know that you will do what you're told and since he didn't want you to go home he wasn't taking you home. I don't know whether you have a car or can drive but I would not be in a situation with him where I had to depend on him to get home. It sounds like you could be raped.
In bad marriage have 2 kids, financially can't make it on my own but want out need out help?
have been married 13 years the past 8 have been bad now to the point we don't speak to one another and try not to be home or awke when the other is, we have 2 kids 10 &12 he is self employed and i can't prove his income, new buisness and still showing losses even though is doing well, i work but don't make enough to support me and kids. i don't have family and he has a large one all around us kids say how he and his family will bad talk me to them i feel stuck and he knows it. i just want peace and happiness for me and my kids, but i hate to mess up their lives because i made a bad choice if you can help me i'm listening and would like to do things the best christian way possible
What are good ways to react when women are hitting on my boyfriend?
My guy attracts predatory females like mosquitoes. Unfortunately, he's WAY too polite, so we have this down to a well-worn routine. If we're at a party or purely social event, we just pretty much stick together unless everyone knows us. I'm short and skinny and easily overlooked, but for some reason I have a reputation for being intimidating, so most women who know us leave him alone, or at least won't go past a light flirtation unless they are really drunk, in which case I recruit some of our soberer friends to help me ease her away.Big receptions and fundraisers are a different story, since we're expected to split up, mingle, and work the room. We stick to a rule of not getting out of sight of each other for more than a few minutes at a stretch and I check on him regularly. If he gives me that old-married HELP ME! look of desperation, I wander over with a "Hi, hon! Having fun?", collect a kiss and a hug, and let him introduce me. I've found that if you're standing close together and he has his hand where your neck and shoulder meet, and you absent-mindedly rub his hand with your cheek, even the densest of dames will usually get the hint.(The downside to all this is that he flatly refuses to go to social events by himself, so if he has to go I have to go too, even if I'd really rather curl up with a good book.)Okay, that's what works for me, but that's because he wants it to work and he gratefully does his part when I come to rescue him. I have no idea what I would do if I found him being utterly happy to be seduced by some sweet young thing. I'd like to think I'd do just what I described in the cocktail party scenario and hope he came to his senses, but I might do something else completely counterproductive, like bursting into tears or kicking him in the shin.My feeling is that every monogamous couple needs to work out unmistakable body language and behavior that says "we're together," and then stick to that script. If I were in a fairly new committed relationship with a guy who enjoyed being hit on by other women, I'd probably have a serious discussion with him about what each of us thought "committed relationship" really meant.Good luck!