What are your top insecurities? How do you deal with them?
First of all , the big obvious one: APPEARANCE!most about my appearance is my smile, because it isn’t mine. Once when I was at the park as a little kid hanging out with my bros some girls started mMy nose is upturned and it makes me look like a pig. My cheeks are way too chubby and I have a curve in between my hips and rib cage that I hate. My teeth are slightly yellow tinted. The thing I hateaking fun of my smile, so I decided to change it. I saw the way my “American Boy Doll” (an American Girl whose hair I had cut and clothes I had made) smiled and practiced it in the mirror. I am now unable to smile any other way genuinely. My chest bothers me a lot and I always have to bind somehow or I get super dysphoric. My thighs are too thick and I have to buy pants a size up. Most of my old self-harm scars are gone, but some stayed and I hate seeing them. Acne is normal, but I still get insecure about it.Now, personality: I have the personality of a crackhead and I really hate sensing that I am being annoying but not being able to stop. That lack of self-control makes me very insecure. I’m very paranoid. I overthink things and end up backing out of dares, bets, etc. I either have extreme trust issues or I spill everything to you when we first meet. I’m messy and have trouble staying organized.
How to control over thinking and insecurity? How to stop it ruining a Long distance relationship?
Long Distance Relationships are difficult , because you cannot see each other quite often, but its still possible to keep going with the bond you share with your partner.When you cannot be physically / geographically close with your partner your emotions are at a peak most of the times.And this high emotions will definitely lead to a lot of overthinking.Why aren't they receiving my call? Are they still hurt because I said something last night? Why did he say that to me? Why is my partner in touch with her/him?Are they really "only friends"?All these questions arise and make your heart sink and you start facing the mental stress.Trust me this is "VERY NORMAL HUMAN TENDENCY"Few things which you can do to overcome this :1. Stop confusing the imagination with reality-(Don't make your imagination run wild in a negative way. Stop assuming things about your partner if they aren't able to give you time)2. Don't try to control. (Don't try to dominant and try to make things work according to your wish. Every time this isn't possible)3. Give room for your partner to breathe. (Give "SPACE" to your partner. They have their own life , don't force them to make you their world and vice versa.)4. See the positive side. (Focus on the good side. See all the things they do for you instead of blaming them for the things they don't do).P.S. Let love radiate , don't try to set boundaries.
Does insecurity kill a relationship?
Of course dude!Insecurity kills all that is beautiful.Insecurity arises when you loose trust in your relationship.Trust is huge aspect of the healthy relationship.We can only love someone we trust.Insecurity creates the tension and mistrust.Insecurity drives people to become too ‘clingy' or needy and this creates problem.Insecure person starts ‘mind reading'.Mind reading happen when we assume we know what someone is thinking when we don't. When you stop doing it,you really begin to respect someone's privacy and every person deserves the right to have space to think their own thoughts.Insecurity kills relationship because of fear of loss or break up than an insecure person is afraid of.Insecure person behaves too bossy or controlling. But in a healthy relationship partner should be mutually supportive.So just keep your insecurity to yourself in a relationship otherwise you will loose your beautiful relationship one day.I mean the choice is yours!
How do I get past my insecurities like "she won't like me anyway" and overthinking in every possible scenario? Why am I like this?
Were you ever taught not to believe in yourself? Were you ever given by a teacher, parent peer, the chance to doubt what you did on an occasion where you got something wrong?Someone somewhere along the line of your life has said something to you that has triggered a statement of “fact” in your head that you now hold to be true which now governs yourself thinking in the negative.See I would say that if you are true yourself and someone doesn't like you - then that is their loss. You are who you are adn you can change who you are if you give yourself permission to change.People don’t change willingly because change triggers ill feeling as the new idea challenges the old comfortable you .Change has 4 phases. 1. Conflict - thinking or believing something new challenges your previous happy thought - 2. Confusion arises as you try and formulate a end position to the new challenge. [this alone usually stops people from progressing] 3. Creation kicks in as you develop or modify your previously held belief in relation to the topic and when you are comfortable with the outcome of that thinking you are 4. Comfortable - holding the new you thinking.So stop overthinking as such and start thinking - what do i want from this situation. Come up with a sentence that best describes what you want form it adnb stick to that - you will find that your insecurities start to melt away as you become happier making dessins that positively impact upon your life. You will then attract the ‘best’ person to you who likes you for who you are and life will be better - good luck!
Overthinking is ruining my life - to the point where I overthink myself out of living. Why do I do this, and what should I do? I do suffer from severe social phobia and depression and have been through severe abuse in my life.
One day I came up with really great article about overthinking and I really want to share it with you.It could change your lifeThere are pointed out 10 points how you can stop Overthinking:Overthinking does not lead to insight. You want an understanding of which decision will be best. For this, you need a level of insight into what each decision will lead to. Thinking this through, however, is futile.You never, ever know what something will be like until you experience it.Your decision will never be final. Over-thinking often comes from the notion that you will make a grand finale decision that will never change and must be correct.Learn the reasons why over-thinking is harmful, and let it motivate you. Stress only occurred if the individual engaged in negative over-thinking about the events.Do physical activities throughout the day. Do you want to know one of the main reasons you over-think? It’s because you have the time to. Consider daily exercise—any physical activity that raises heart rate and improves health.Become the ultimate skeptic. If you think about what causes thinking to be so stressful and tiring, it’s often our personal convictions that our thoughts are actually true.Seek social support, but don’t vent. It is really powerful impact of social support in the reduction of stress.Develop the skill of forgiveness. It’s special because it, single-handedly, can induce the ultimate peace in people.Plan for conscious distraction. When you know the time of day rumination will begin, you can plan to remove that spare time with an activity that engages your full facultiesSolve another person’s problem first, and get perspective. Helping others puts your issues in order by reminding you that we all go through tough times, some much more than you ever will.Remember that a perfect decision is never a bold one, so get started. When your final years are approaching, you will not worry about how well you thought through your decisions, or how thoroughly and accurately you approached life’s forks in the road. You will rest happily knowing you lived true to yourself, acted with confidence, and stood up for what you believed in.Here is full article - 10 Ways to Stop Overthinking and Start LivingI hope this helps! ;)
Why do I overthink so much? It feels like my brain will never shut off.
The question is “is over thinking really a problem”. And the answer is YES, it is. You have to differentiate between thinking and over thinking. Over thinking is exhausting your energy, mind and time in thinking about a person, a situation or a past event. Over thinking is not something that can happen to people that are mentally unstable, it is like having a fever, you have to accept that it is there, take necessary steps and it will be gone.No matter how powerful and tempting the thoughts in your mind are they are useless and if you don’t act on them at the right moment. Acting on the right moment means either to stop thinking if the thought is random and trivial or act if the thought makes sense to you.If you over analyze each and everything, you judge each and every person around you, chances are you are thinking more than necessary. Over thinking happens because you either live in the past or worry about the future. Believe me 90% of the psychological problems of the population can be solved if we just start living in the moment, cherishing the present. We cannot change the past nor have control over the future, so the best we can do is reduce the stress, worry state and start a new relationship with the present.given below is the link that suggests the way in which you can overcome over thinking :- 10 Simple Ways You Can Stop Yourself From Overthinking