I feel like my mom loves my sister more than me. How do I deal with that?
I sometimes feel the same way about my mother and sister, so I know what you are feeling very well.There are two things that happen in this case.It is possible that you are just guessing things and that your mother loves you both equally. In this case, try to talk to her that you feel this way. Talking helps. This way you'll understand what's the truth. If you usually don't share feelings with your mum and you feel uncomfortable talking about this, (I do), try to be stronger and try asking her. Or try talking to your sister.It is really that your mother loves your sister more. In this case, first comes acceptance. You have to accept the fact that she loves her more, and you have to understand that it's neither your, your mother's or your sister's fault. They can't choose who they like more. Also, understand that she loves you anyway. And that's what matters.I have a question for you.If there is a boat with your mum inside it and both you and your sister were drowning. Your mum can save only one person. Who will she save?You'd say, obviously, my sister. But that's the wrong answer. Here is what she will do. She will first put one of you on the boat and then ask you to help other one on the boat and she'll jump into the water, so that she can save you both. This is her love for her children.Usually, like 90% of times, parents love their children more than their lives. And maybe sometimes they love one child more than the other. They still love both unconditionally.I don't know if I am using the right words and example, but I hope you understand.Cheers! :)
I feel like killing my sister?
I know this sounds weird and psychotic. But I can't help but feeling this way. My sister is annoying and disrespectful. She's constantly loud, she doesn't obey (to my mother, or me), She has a really bad attitude and often curses at me and even my mother. She says stuff like, "F" you. and I hope you die. She says "B*tch", "Motherf*cker", well you get my idea. I was raised by my father, to always obey and be respectful. And if I even dared to raise my voice, I would get punished or hit. Fortunately, I knew how to behave and never got hit. But my dad and mum divorced so now my mum is taking care of me and my sister and my father isn't there to discipline her. The thing is, I literally have thought of murdering my sister. She often responds back to me, & I am 7 years older than her. She doesn't obey, as I said. And lies a lot so my mum hits me. She lies to her about me forcing her to do stuff, which I never do. And then laughs when my mum hits me because of her. I feel like my life is miserable. I wish she was never born. And the only thing that keeps me from killing her is the thought of going to jail. I don't want to spend the rest of my life in jail, just because I had to kill someone who constantly made my life miserable. And she's only 7. But she's mean, rude, and she hits me back all the time. When my mum tries to discipline her she tells her stuff like "Fat *****", "You're not my mother", "I hate you", ect. & my mum does nothing about it. But If I even raise my voice a bit, my mum hits me. This is so unfair. I never misbehave and I get hit, she doesn't. I want to kill her.
Is it bad when my sister says she hates me?
Well first of all my sister is a VERY dramatic 11 year old. I get mad at her when she goofs off about me being 13 and having to shave and have periods and **** like that.... but today we were playing cath outside because softball is coming up and I am planning to be pitcher this year... So I drop the ball and I let it roll down the hill and I go I wanna go in and I leave then she starts BAWLING and I just roll my eyes and walk away knowing she's only doing it that loud because she wants my parents to hear it so I will get in trouble. She comes inside a couple minutes later and she tells me dad I wouldn't pick up the ball and I was throwing to hard. I don't say anything and neither does my dad. So she comes over to me and goes I HATE YOU!!!!! then she walks out.... she came in a second later and said Daddy that wasn't meant for you it was meant for Billi. And now I feel really bad... because aren't I supposed to be her role model.... My sister does do all the same things as me and I do get irritated by it but I do like someone I can tell my secrets to who I can always trust.... Right now I feel like I lost my best friend..... Is there anything to get her not upset with me anymore, like faster? Because I love her so much... if she got killed in a car accident or something I would be so furious I would probably kill my self also! I ♥ her and if anything makes her upset I get sad.... but this is WAY to far... hating me..... ugh.... help?
Should I trust my sister?
Ask yourself whether she's actually what u can call "a sister"? I'm sorry but the answer is no! I think you can make her think differently by displaying how much you love her (even if its just for the objective of stopping her hatred/ jealousy towards you), gift her little things often with sentimental notes declaring how much you love and trust her, talk to her very often about things she likes, you can cry and tell her about some things that are disturbing you (if u HAVE to, u can fake it, anything imaginary can be the supposed problem), you can also pay her compliments about her looks and all that stuff, that way you can make her feel guilty about what she's doing and you can make your way to her good books.. Nevertheless, do not trust her in sensitive matters!
My sister says she is depressed. She is being treated by therapists, but I think she is just a spoilt bratty child and overly pampered. How can I be sure she is actually depressed?
Okay so I’m a person with depression so I’m familiar with the symptoms, but I also have a relative who plays up her symptoms for convenience.First of all - it’s the specialists who diagnose her, not you. Secondly - Depression often makes a person incapable of empathy, incapable of looking outside their own bubble. When I’m in a depressed state I can’t read body language or understand how my actions might affect people. It’s not deliberate, it’s more thoughtlessness than selfishness.Selfishness is ‘I know this upsets you but I’m gonna do it anyway’ whereas thoughtlessness is ‘Even if you told me this upsets you, it honestly didn’t cross my mind and I’m so sorry I hurt you.’If she’s in therapy and trying to listen to the advice her therapists give her, that’s one thing. If she’s jumping between therapists and complaining about every treatment they try, refusing to do even the tiniest thing to help herself - then that’s a problem. But it might also be a symptom.People with depression actually need to be pampered sometimes. Because they feel so lost and alone they forget that they are loved. Gods sometimes I just need a hug.Example: When I have an anxiety attack I know what helps. I’ll get a glass of water, focus on my breathing, go for a walk ect. I do my best to manage my symptoms.When my relative has an anxiety attack, she’ll refuse any suggestion of a walk or fresh air, she won’t slow her breathing even when you guide her, in fact she’ll ramp it up. She will sit stock still and focus only on the panic. It’s not that these things don’t work for her, it’s that she’ll refuse any help or effort to alleviate her symptoms at all. When she actually takes her medication or follows our advise she feels much better and says as much.People not believing our symptoms is unbelievably damaging. Your attitude is honestly a problem. We are often asked to ‘prove’ our symptoms when we can’t.How do you describe a smell to someone who has never smelt it? A sight to someone who has never seen? It’s not something we can clearly explain because we know no other point of view. We have no standard to measure our symptoms. We don’t know what’s ‘normal’ for other people.Your sister needs love and support. Let the professionals work out her symptoms and if they tell you something, listen to and believe them.
I'm sick of always being compared to my sister?
You are a special person with your own identity. God made you the way you are. I was shy and introverted growing up and got picked on for many different reasons. I got called 4 eyes because of my glasses, Fido because it is similar to my last name, etc. . . I know it is hard to do, but try to let it roll off your back. When they say why are you not like Ashley, then tell them because you are not Ashley, you are................ When your parents say Ashley did this and that, tell them that you feel like they are comparing you to your sister and that you feel like no one thinks you are good enough when told those things. Tell them you want them to love you for you... When the teachers say those things, say politely that they should know of all people that everyone is different and most sisters are not the same. Please don't make me feel like I am not good enough like my sister. Taking your own life because of this is not worth it. There is so much waiting for you around the corner that you would really miss out on if you tried. I bet if you truly talked to them, they wouldn't know that you were hurting so bad by the things they said. I am sure they love you and don't realize what they are doing. What are you good at? Art, math, photography? Focus on something you are good at and excell at it. Please don't stop trying to communicate your true feelings with your family. Talk to your counselor at school. Some people may have good intentions and not realize that you feel that way. Now that I am older and don't live near my family, I am actually honored when they say, are you so and so sister? I am proud of them and who they are and what they have accomplished. I actually hear about things my siblings have done and I never knew. Try smiling and say Yes, she is my sister and I love her. I am a totally different person and I am a good sister. Why don't you try to get to know me a little better. Try to make new friends and get to know your old friends better. I will pray for you. Here is a big hug just for you. I pray you feel the love you need and really didn't know was there just for you.
When your boyfriend says 'shes like my sister' is it just an excuse?
When he says, shes like my sister, and we're just friends, is that just an excuse so they can be really close...? they have a close relationship, but they say their like siblings...? worry or not...?
Argh I feel like my sister is stealing my identity?
My sister is 4 years younger than me, but I feel like she's trying to become me. When I found out that I had a strong talent for drawing, that made me feel special and set me apart from her. But she's also become fond of drawing and does the same as me! I've also branched off from mainstream music and found a passion for alternative stuff which I love and makes me really different from everyone else. But then my sister decides she likes all the same stuff as me and wants it as well. This makes me mad because I don't feel different or special or set apart, just stuck in the background again. My sister is only 12 and hates it when I say she's copying me, because she feels that she isn't. I don't know what to do because I don't want her to become me and this is really annoying because my art and my music is my personality and is like my soul. And please don't say that imitation is the strongest form of flattery or whatever because that is not a helpful sentence.