Pressure For Beauty From Friends

I avoid friends and acquaintances because I feel pressure to entertain them when they're around. What should I do?

An idea would be, instead of making the “eat food and have conversations” kind of plans, next time they want to hang out suggest an activity instead (ex: play board or role-playing games, play mini-golf, go to the theatre, dance salsa, sing karaoke, have a spa beauty day, do a wine tasting etc.). That way, you wouldn't have to worry that much about entertaining them, since the activity itself is the entertainment. Also, let them suggest an activity once in a while and see what they come up with : it doesn't have to always be on you

Do you feel pressure to be beautiful for your family?

My mom has never made it a mystery that she wanted me and my twin sister to look pretty, especially in occasions where we would meet her friends or colleagues. Growing up I started liking doing my make up, dressing up nicely and so on, even though it took me years and years before I started finding it appealing and I am still not a girly girl: my twin sister doesn't enjoy any of that to this day.My mom often insists for her to take more care of her appearances. I also tell her something from time to time, but my concern is about her looks not being professional enough for a job interview. I couldn't care less how she wants to dress in her daily life or if she enjoys grooming or not; my mom can't just get over it, and they recently argued about it.I know she does that because she wants us to be well received by society and not out of malice, but I wish she would just leave her alone when it comes to this. Who said all women should put efforts into looking their best even if they don't want to? After all grooming (and I don't mean washing, but things like taking time to style your hair or paint your nails) can be a lot of work, and if one doesn't like it I can see why they would just skip it. Women are not born to be pleasant to people's eyes: if one is ok with not meeting society's idea of what their clothes, skin, hair and face should look like, I see nothing problematic with it.My mother, I think, has a very conservative point of view and I can't agree with her on this. She's also not always happy with how I carry myself, but compared to how she bothers my sister she is much less annoying when it's about my fashion style and choices.No one else in my family gives a flying crap, so it's a one woman show for my mom, thankfully! I guess it's the same for most women in the world so I don't feel like I have been particularly unlucky to have a parent that is so concerned about her daughters looks, but I do wish she gave less importance to these kind of things from time to time.

How can I cope with the fact that the society puts a lot of pressure on girls to be beautiful but not so much on being smart and actually do something for the world?

Well, Hmmm.I think this depends of the society your focus is set on.Social media or better yet let’s take the originator MEDIA is indeed focussed on beauty.But Beauty is a lot of things, beauty can be:appearancecharacterwisdomcreativityetc.I think, ( purely my opinion) the biggest part starts with the parenting. In your younger years your brain and spirit is the most receptive for inputs, think about sound, visual, smell, touch. Here it is prone to be taught what life is about.We learn to love, we learn to accept, we learn to judge, we learn to question things in life and many more. So if your environment is to dominant in one of those aspect you tend to lean more to that emotional state. Thus the parents, teacher's, family and friends are playing a very important role in whom you will become.Now if we consider how fast we learn stuff in our younger years, and how long it takes in our older years to learn something. it becomes very important what we are getting fed during our younger years.Negativity is far more receptacle for our brains than positivity. and Media is generally used for spreading all sorts of negativity, don't get me wrong their are positive news etc as well but in comparison it is less( considering the environment you are in again of course).Somebody once said s*x sells, and apparently it does and will for generations to come. So instead of being against it, instead of being against the way the system seems to work. We should use the tools out there, we should leverage the system to reach out and do something for the society and actually contribute to the world.Human beings tends to misinterpret things. e.g.: If a Celebrity would say: “That women really looks nice in her Red Dress” all of a sudden the whole world is searching for the brand and store to buy that same dress. But what was said in that particular moment was that at a certain point in time a certain person liked the the outfit of another person , That’s it.Long story short, what is guess to say is: if people would just take care of them self and accept them self for whom they are, and not stress too much about what others might think of them and how they look ( just be hygienic) and focus their effort to help contributing to life. We are all unique and because of our imperfections we are perfect.

I don’t want to have any friends because I like being on my own. I feel like society pressures me into trying to make friends. Is it okay to want to be a loner?

What you wrote is really four statements in one question:1. "I don't want to have any friends..."2. "I like being on my own..."3. "I feel like society's pressuring me into trying to make friends."4. "Is it ok to want to be a loner?"Let's take one at a time. 1. Ok. Not sure this is a good idea. Pretty sure it's not.2. Sure. Nothing wrong with that.3. It is. Society is definitely pressuring you into trying to make friends.4. Yes, absolutely. Don't just want to be one, BE one!So basically, I give you a green light on all items but #1. Let's talk about #1. It's a doozy. I'm going to say something, you can disagree, downvote, block me - but I have to say it.WE ALL NEED FRIENDS.Yep. I went for a long LONG time thinking I didn't. I'm the biggest loner you've ever met. I hiked the Appalachian Trail by myself. I backpacked to more than 30 countries, by myself. I spend weeks at a time writing, not engaging with a single person - that is my chosen profession. As of today, I've been away from my husband for three weeks, I've talked to him once during that time. I've never been in anyone's wedding, I've never been anyone's best friend. I hate parties, social events and anything that involves people.I'm a complete, total loner.But I was wrong about friendship. I was wrong about what it was.Friendship is not about parties and social events, who posts on your FB wall or how many contacts you have in your phone.Friendship is about bearing witness. Friendship is about trust. Friendship is about love and support. We all need that, a witness, a confidant, a support.Even me. Even you.You can be a loner. You can never hang out, if you don't want. You can not go to parties. You can avoid Facebook. Do all those things, sure.But you cannot set yourself up to feel totally alone.That is no way for any human to feel, we're not wired this way. And if you don't have a single soul in the world who knows you, who is looking out for you, who witnesses you - you will feel totally alone. Maybe not now, but at some point in your life. Please don't let yourself get to that point.Whatever you have to do to find a friend, in the way that feels right to you - do it. That's not pressure, it's solid advice from someone who learned the hard way and doesn't want you to make the same mistake.

How Do I run away from world? Tension, anxiety, work pressure are taking away my life. What should I do?

My friend, there's always a sunshine after the storm.Look, running away from the problems will only add them. So, it's better to face them rather than running away.Their are many a times when I am too frustrated, I face hundreds of mood swings, confused a lot what to do further ...and what not. I am too a lot tensed, anxious about various problems or the outcomes of my actions. At those times, I want solitude. I don't like to talk to anyone during those times. But believe me, when someone comes with the supporting hand, or the people who are close with me...when I vent out my problems with them...I do feel light. They motivate me and that's what actually brings a change in my then outlook of the problems whether it's work pressure or anything.So, go out and talk to people who are close to you or who understands you.Read motivational books like of Shiv khera . Watch out motivational videos on YouTube (I personally like Sandeep Maheshwari and Subash Chandra Shows)For relieving out anxiety and stress, do yoga . It's really beneficial.And lastly always keep in mind U are not alone in this world who is suffering or facing with the problems and I think u too know that very well. Remember my friend, Winner is the one who faces and struggles with the problems no matter how hard they are and achieves success.Don't be a loser, be a fighter.