Ex boyfriends mother has cancer.....?
You need to do what you feel you need to do - your visit will mean a lot to his mother, and no matter how it turns out you'll have no regrets about not following your heart - this has nothing to do with your ex, and your parents and current boyfriend should realize that.
Should i be ok with my boyfriend hanging out with the mother of his child?
Sure, it could be perfectly fine..It really depends on how old you guys are, and what kind of person he is and she is. But in reality, chances of him going back to her (for an affair (on youuu), a one-night thing (sex.), or back together all together.) If he does have feelings for her, he may remember those feelings he used to have. If she really wants him back and is a skank then I'd just leave now if I were you. Tell him to prove he wants YOU in his life. But then again..the more you push and question; may push him into doing you wrong when nothing would have happened before. See if you can come on the dinner or movie date...See what's really up. This situation..you'll never be okay with. The mother of his child isn't okay with it.. Sorry.
My boyfriends kids hate me!?
I'm 24 and have been seeing my bf whos 32 for almost 10 months now. He was married but his wife walked out on him and their 2 daughters almost 2 years ago. She has no effort to get in contact with them. His daughters are 6 and 9 and hate me! I understand that they miss their mom and want her back but why take it out on me? I've been nothing but nice to them. I've taken them on special days out to the zoo and other places,bought them toys and I read them a story whenever I'm a their house when its their bedtime. But they still hate me. They actually say that they hate me. They have thrown things at me and hit and kicked me on several occasions. I don't know what I can do!
Is my boyfriend still involved with the mother of his kids if he wants me to do an abortion?
if he wants you to have an abortion - you have to ask yourself why you had sex with him unprotected to begin with? To have unprotected sex in this day and age and then treat a child that is conceived as a commodity to be destroyed is terrible and is an indictment against your boyfriend.It might mean that he still wants a relationship with his ex-wife of the mother of his other children, and who knows, there may be more children you don’t know about - but that relationship will exist as long as the children are alive - that can’t be stopped - and it would be wrong to ask him to give them up for you.He has no right to ask you for an abortion if the sex was consensual. If consensual he consented for a child to be conceived. It’s your baby - make your own decisions - not dependent on him.He will be liable for child support whether he likes it or not. He didn’t want a baby, he should not have had consensual unprotected sex.
My boyfriend still sees his ex-wife's kids?
I have been with my boyfriend for almost seven months. He is still in contact with his ex-wife and her family and picks up his ex-wife's kids on a regular basis. I thought it was sweet at first since they aren't his kids. That is until I met them. I have always gotten along great with kids, but these two are the most horrible kids I have ever dealt with! The oldest is eight and the youngest is seven. The oldest is so mean! A few things he's done: He got a butter knife and told my boyfriend's mom that he was gonna stab her, and when I tried to take the knife, he told me he would stab me too. My bf was outside so I went and told him what happened. He came inside and his mom told him what happened. He asked him if he said he was gonna stab us, and he said no and my bf believed him!!!! Another incident...the oldest shot the youngest with a BB gun. All my bf did was talk to him and nicely! The youngest gets spanked for EVERYTHING (probably why HE acts bad), but the oldest can do the same thing and nothing happens to him! The kids aren't even my bf kids. My kids are older, and he never says anything about them. If it was up to him, I wouldn't see them at all. He made the Christmas list, and my kids weren't even listed on it. I taught my kids to be polite. They are 19 and 23 and say ma'am and sir and please and thank you. I'm to the point to where I wanna break up with him because of those kids. They are very disrespectful to everyone except him. I don't want to sound selfish because I am very unselfish, but I wish he wouldn't get them at all. His family thinks he sees them to stay in contact with his ex. All I know is it is driving me insane.
Boyfriend wants me to be his childrens mother?
You're not crazy. You're actually very smart to realize that you will never be those children's mother: that's their mother's job! Forgive me if I sound cynical or skeptical, but it sounds to me as if there's a possibility that your boyfriend is trying to use you to get custody of his kids. You have a better job, make more money, and if he can get you to marry him, the house you and he share will likely be viewed as the better home for the children in the state's eyes. This is probably something your boyfriend isn't able to do on his own, for whatever reason, or he would have already. I'm curious, have you faced him down and asked him why he changed his mind all of a sudden? Two years ago he told you he didn't see his kids and he didn't want you to be their mom, why the difference now? Maybe I'm jaded, or a bit too suspicious, but in your situation I would be very cautious. It all seems shady to me. You're a young woman and it seems like you've got a whole lot going for you. I would suggest that you keep your independence and self-reliance, though I'm not so sure about keeping him. Good luck, hope it turns out for the best.
What is the best way to deal with my boyfriend's daughter's mother?
You can't. The mother is there, she's a permanent fixture, and in the end, you are the one who needs to adjust, he's bound to her because of their child. What goes on between them may impact you but what you work out is with him, and you see, the problem is, they are bound to each other as long as well, forever, so be prepared for a bumpy ride. The best way is to stand back, deal with the issues between you and him, try to soften the impact of their relationship on yours, and just do the best you can. You aren't the first to go through this - hundreds of thousand have gone before, and they just make it work in the best way they can to keep as much peace as possible.
I love my boyfriend, but his kids don’t like me. What should I do?
It’s normal.If you tried to force the relationship or your boyfriend did, pull back. They need time. Be nice, caring and thoughtful to them and their dad.Don’t be overly romantic or sexual in front of them. This is super uncomfortable and hurtful for them to see. No making out or gushing about how you or he never loved anyone this much. You can say it to each other in private but not in front of the kids.NEVER criticize their mom. If she’s truly horrible, discreetly complain to your best girlfriend when no one is around. They should never never hear you insult or complain about her. Treat her with respect and consideration when they are not around. If you are horrible to her when they are not there, it will get back to them. Either indirectly because of your attitudes towards each other or directly because she is actually telling them how badly you treat her.Don’t be critical of them. They have parents. You need to let the parents “parent” until you are officially in that role hopefully a few years into the relationship.Don’t try to buy their affection with material things. Do things that show you think about them. Make their favorite food. If their favorite band is coming to town, buy tickets for your boyfriend and the child to go together without you and give them both the present from you. Let your boyfriend know ahead of time. Do NOT join even if they insist. Tell them you want to hear about it after and see videos.Find out what their interests are and encourage your boyfriend to spend time with them both without you and with you. They need time with their dad that is focused on them.If you do all this, over time you will develop a good relationship with them…
My boyfriend won't spend time with me when he has his kids. Should I be patient or end the relationship?
Ah, a tricky situation, to be sure. Having been in a slightly similar situation to you, I can tell you that you need to have a sit down and hard think about this relationship. I assume you have no kids of your own -is that right? I know you can’t answer me (ha ha), so I will assume that. Based on that assumption, you are in the unenviable place that all of us without children find ourselves: of playing second fiddle to someone else’s kids. I hate it. A lot. Which is why I’ve decided to make the supreme effort NOT to be with someone with kids next time I get married. It’s just not worth it. No matter how loving a person who has kids may be, you and I will always come after their kids. Now on the one hand, one can argue that as being totally appropriate. But, the truth of the matter is that it’s not healthy. In an ideal world, the kids and the step mom / dad would have equal value. It’s been my experience that such balance is incredibly rare. Indeed, some people are actually proud of the fact that they put their kids above the SO! That, IMHO, is very unhealthy, immature and manipulative.Anyway (climbing down off my hobbyhorse…), you need to face the fact that this is likely a permanent thing, or at least one that is going to be long-lived. You don’t need to feel guilty about your desire to be with your BF when he’s with his kids, but you do either have to make peace with the fact that this is his way, come hell or high water, or you will need to find someone who doesn’t have kids. There are more guys without kids than women (as I’ve discovered to my dismay), so your chances of finding a guy who is childless is pretty high. I don’t think this is a trivial matter - it’s actually very important. If you and your BF can’t come to an agreement on this, one way or the other, it will be a thorn in your relationship that generates bitterness and resentment until the cows come home.Blessings to you, my friend. Please make good, healthy choices for yourself, looking to the long-term. You need to feel loved and cared for and special. If your BF’s lifestyle is such that you don’t feel that, you’re just with the wrong guy - it’s not one’s fault, it’s just life.
My boyfriend is still really good friends with his child's mother.?
My ex and I are friends. Our relationship is really strained now because his new wife doesn't want him to be friends with me or see his children. If I wanted him as my husband anymore, I would have him. Remember, she wants to know about you because you may one day have a part in their child's life. Believe me, I would not have chosen the girl my ex is with now. He has let her come between him, his kids, and me as his friend. They are having problems now. It is to late for him to mend it with me and his children. You say that you are just now starting to really develop feelings for this man. Let him know that if you are going to be a part of his life you want to get to know his ex and child. She may anticipate and hope to be friends with you and figure that if you can drive all the better since she doesn't. Also I am sure the time will come when you have to pick up or drop off the child. It is natural for her to want to know more about you. Get to know more about her too. You will probably be glad you did. Don't try to come between them. It's not fair or your right as long as their relationship is platonic and about their child.